Lessons Learned

Hypocritical Resolution

/ The WheatandTares / 20 Comments

I don’t usually post anything on Fridays other than the New Angle game, but in light of last night’s tragedy, my heart is heavy today, and my pen longs to bleed… 

The screams of “our lives matter” and demands for justice for the death of brothers, with the resulting applause for the stealing of the lives of the very men sworn to protect all, reveal a heart of hypocrisy. 

Your life doesn’t carry significance simply because of its tone or contrast. One life is not of higher quality due to its origin. The value of your life is just that: because you are a living, breathing human being. 

The lives that were slaughtered near the midnight hour on July 7 were not lives of value because of their skin color, and they were not wielding swords to kill their assassins. They did not throw fiery darts just before the bullets pierced their ashen skin. 

No, these men and women were standing watch on a wall. Sworn to defend and protect the innocent lives who stood in protest. Doesn’t matter if these fallen soldiers were or weren’t in agreement with the march; their oath was to defend, to protect, and to shield the innocent from harm. Yet, while they stood as pillars of strength, men of cowardly hearts came with evil intent and annihilated the very strength on which our nation stands. 

This strength does not come because of the color of skin you were birthed nor does it remain because of the hues you now have gained. This strength comes from fighting day in and day out for the cause of the innocent. This strength is birthed in the chambers of integrity, love and a desire for peace among all. This strength is paid for at all cost. For life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness is not so easily won. It is not simply obtained because you wish it so. 

Do we really believe the hypocrisy in the killings will bring about peace and restoration? Unbridled anger never resolved anything with any person. I’ve heard it said, “Anger makes room for the unthinkable.” 

This was proven on this night, the 7th day of July. Anger has brought division. Division has brought unbridled anger as it has led to hypocrisy and injustice. Injustice will continue as the innocent are killed for the sake of retribution. For unbridled anger will never bring peace, only more blood shed and the loss of freedom, peace and any hope for restoration. 

God, please forgive us and heal our nation. Please bring unity and rest. Protect the innocent and open the eyes of all. For You are the only One who can save us! We must reach out across the aisles. We must lay down our agendas for the sake of our future. We must seek a higher call than ourselves and selfish ambition. 

  
“A man of great wrath will suffer punishment; For if you rescue him, you will have to do it again.” Proverbs 19:19

“Make no friendship with an angry man, And with a furious man do not go, Lest you learn his ways And set a snare for your soul.” Proverbs 22:24

“A wrathful man stirs up strife, But he who is slow to anger allays contention.” Proverbs 15:18

Will You Fan The Flame?

/ The WheatandTares / 6 Comments

I was reminded the other day of an analogy I shared with youth camp workers many years ago, and I thought I’d reshare it with you today…

In every situation, you hold in your hands water and gasoline. The one you choose will determine the outcome of the given situation.

For instance, if you find yourself in the middle of a gossip situation, and you’re wondering what you should do, you have a choice. You can pour gasoline on the flames to fuel the stories, or you can pour water to put them out.

If your child comes running to you in fear, whether it be a dramatized fantasy or a realistic paranoia, what you do in that next moment matters. Sometimes, it will determine the growth of courage or a lasting lifetime fear. Do you throw the gasoline or water?

If your co-worker is infuriated with your boss because of a legitimate injustice being served, what do you do? You hold water and gasoline within your power.

If your friend is in desperate need of a life change. Maybe you know Christ, but you’ve been a little intimidated by their rejection of this saving grace. You know what peace you have found in your moments of fear, of anger and of brokenness; yet, you’ve hesitated to share your story. You hold water and gasoline within your grasp. Which will you choose??

“And if it seems evil to you to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” Joshua 24:15

Looks Can Be Deceiving

/ The WheatandTares / 6 Comments

Have you ever been deceived simply by the look of something (or someone)? I know I have. You can scroll on social media for this truth to be revealed in a matter of seconds.

I thought of this reality as I took a picture of part of my lunch the other day…

 Look at it. It looks like such an incredibly healthy lunch. Life coaches all over would be so proud of me eating zucchini, cucumbers, carrots with hummus and a huge bowl full of fruit! Let me tell you, it was delicious, but what I’m going to tell you next might be surprising… I didn’t eat all of what’s pictured here, and I, also, ate a piece of pizza and a handful of fried pickles!

Sorry, only two were left when I thought to grab my camera!

Now, I really didn’t write all this to debate the merits of healthy foods or even brag on what I had for lunch. I am sharing all this to emphasize a point: Looks can be deceiving, and in this modern age, where technology reigns supreme, those looks can become downright atrocious!

The Word tells us to guard our hearts, for everything we do flows from it. (Prov. 4:23) We must keep it honest. We must keep our minds pure. We must maintain a standard of integrity even when we think no one is looking.

Let’s get real. Everything you see posted on Facebook, Instagram and every other social medium, isn’t always the truth. Sometimes, people will post falsehoods to help themselves feel better, to outshine someone else, or to simply draw better attention than they would have otherwise, but what is it worth in the end? Nothing! It only leads to heartache, loneliness, anger and despair.

So, be truthful with one another. Be real. Don’t put forth a bunch of junk. For those who long for a real relationship with you deserve the truth, and even more so, your own soul deserves it. If all we have portrayed is fallacies and deception, the long term consequences are so much worse than the short term truths ever would have been. Your heart needs truth to reign supreme for your life to uphold dignity, grace and integrity.

“Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life. Put away from you a deceitful mouth, And put perverse lips far from you. Let your eyes look straight ahead, And your eyelids look right before you. Ponder the path of your feet, And let all your ways be established. Do not turn to the right or the left; Remove your foot from evil.” Proverbs 4:23-27

When It Rains, It Pours

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

Sometimes, when it rained, it pours…

Yesterday, I talked to a gentleman whose mom passed away last week. Just a few days prior to this news, his wife was in a diabetic coma and had to have a stint put in so her heart could work properly. The same week, the family received a call concerning her mother, who had fallen and broken a hip. She lives in a different country, and his wife is in no condition to travel to see her.

Just got off the phone with someone whose parents are no longer able to go out on their own. They think her father may have had a mini stroke, and both her parents seem to be growing more feeble as the days progress. This same lady has an aunt who has to be taken to every appointment she has, and she’s the designated driver…seems she has several appointments each week.

Another friend is facing the grief of a divorce while another is living in a marriage she hates. An old friend is traveling back and forth to the Children’s Hopsital almost every day. Her teenage daughter has been diagnosed with cancer, and they’re giving her high doses of chemo. One more is weeping for her child whom she will never know, because she miscarried the only child she may ever have.

All of this is just within my little orbit of the world. I don’t even want to think about the daily news or the paper headlines which come out every 24 hours or less. If I continue to focus on all of this brokenness, I will become overwhelmed, drowning in a puddle of tears and hopelessness.

Sometimes, when it rains, it really does pour, and if we are wise, we will let the clouds roll on…

For when it rains, the water replenishes the dry places. The rains bring new life where there were parched and dying lands. The rains drown the fires and can even put out the smoke.

When the storms come, and the rain pours down from the skies that don’t seem to relent, just hold on. Don’t lose hope. Maybe, you even need to seek out the Hope you never had.

For after the rains stop, and the clouds roll back, that’s the only time for the rainbow to shine…

How Do You Pray?

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

Wow. Read this in my devotion today and thought I’d share. I hope it’s as meaningful to you as it was for me…

The English word, prayer, means to ask for or beg … But the Hebrew word for prayer – tefillah – means to “self evaluate”. So to the Jews of the Bible, prayer was not a time when they asked God for things … it was a time when they examined themselves. They would use prayer as a way to compare their actions, behavior and attitude against God’s holiness.” – Dave Adamson, Instagram.com/aussiedave 

What kind of prayer life would we have if we self evaluated more and begged less? Our prayers are, so often, filled with a long checklist of things we need, problems we wish were solved, and various changes or resolutions we want. Yes, we need to place our petitions before the Lord, I get it. The Bible does say, bring your petitions, but I believe we miss this point of self evaluation sometimes. I think that’s why the acronym PRAY is often taught to us in Sunday School when we are young. 

P = Praise – praise Him for He is good and He is God. 

R = Repent – this is where self evaluation comes in. Clean up time. 

A = Ask – here’s the supplication or petitioning part. 

Y = You – focus turns back on ourselves once again. Might be a reason He created this word, “pray” and it’s Hebrew translation. 😉

Lord, help us to be more aware. Help us to be more honest, with You and with ourselves. Help us to self evaluate in our prayer life.  Help us to be more like You and so much less like ourselves. 💗

  

We Are Moms

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

Ok, so, if you’ll indulge me, I’m going to rant for just a moment. I am so sick of all the bickering across social media, blogs and other “news” mediums, and I just want to shout this from the rooftops: STOP IT!!  *Please note before I start, I am not looking for a debate, and I am not trying to offend. I just feel the need to say something, and I hope you will read till the end…

There is so much shaming, fingerpointing and backbiting that, too often lately, I feel as if I’m back in kindergarten, or better yet, I’m back in junior high listening to the 12 year old girls bickering over who’s fault it is that the popular girl doesn’t like them anymore! 😁 It’s silly, and it’s really becoming annoying.

We have had several MAJOR tragedies in our country over the last several weeks, and the news media and social media feeds have been lit up like Christmas trees. Everyone is trying to find someone to blame for the gorilla, the alligator and the night club violence, because after all, it couldn’t be as interesting as simply be sympathetic toward the families who are grieving over their lost loved ones! It couldn’t be as intriguing as trying to reach out to the ones mourning.

These mothers will never hug their babies again in this life. (And yes, I realize the nightclub was not filled with ‘babies,’ but to a mother, her child will always be her ‘baby,’ no matter his or her age.) These fathers will never rescue their children from another emergency. These grandparents will never see their grandbabies smile those beautiful smiles that made their hearts swell with love. Why can we not stop all the fighting for a split second and observe the value of a life? Observing the value of life does not mean I must agree or disagree with the person or his or her lifestyle for that life to be valuable.

Why? Because this country has become too accustomed to shaming anybody and everybody who avails him or herself to the public eye. We have become too comfortable with setting ourselves as judge and juror,  bondsman and, even, the thought police. This ought not be.

Can I tell you? I am a mom. I love my babies, and I do my very best to take care of them the best way I know how. Do I always do everything perfect? By all means, No! I wake up everyday and pray the Lord help me and guide me, because I am human, and humans make mistakes, and accidents can happen.

Now, just because I do my best, does that put every mom into that same category? No, unfortunately, I can’t say that it does. Some moms are so focused on themselves or their own agendas that they are neglective or oblivious to their child’s needs. Some moms are so jacked up that they cannot cope and function the way they should. Other moms are just simply wrong in how they handle life, children and all of the above.

Yet, it’s not my place (or yours) to get on social media or any other news medium and blast that mom for what I believe she did or didn’t do right. I don’t even know the woman. If we are not within her orbit, didn’t see exactly what happened and have no tangible access to her world, how can we sit in judgement and shame her, or praise her, for what we have drawn as our own opinions?? …and why should we? Don’t we have better things to do with our time??

If there has been a crime committed, the authorities will figure that out. It is their job. That is what they are trained to do! That’s what they are doing at that nightclub. They’ve determined it was an act of terrorism; so, why is the bickering still focused on gun control and the life of the homosexual? The news media and liberal agendas seem to enjoy stirring up the opinions on everything else but the real issue at hand. The fact is, we are all Americans, no matter race, origin, religion or sexual orientation, and we have some real enemies in this world. These enemies would like to see us ALL dead, and our fighting amongst ourselves is not going to change this fact, nor will it help to bring resolution to that fact. Sometimes, there is a war to be fought, and we must fight it. Shooting in amongst the troops isn’t going to kill the enemy. It will only hinder our efforts to win.

On the two other tragedies, if there is a wrong to be found, those involved in the situation will be called upon to right that wrong. If she (and he) is found to be untrue, and she is to be chastised for her faulty ways, then those closest to her and those in leadership surrounding her should speak into her life for reprimand and change, but who are you and I to think it is our place to publicly shame her? Do you really think that is going to make a difference in her life?

Sometimes, shaming is for coping, and sometimes, it’s for competing. We are moms. We shouldn’t do either, but it all comes from vanity. Either you feel better than someone else or worse than them. So, you compare. You compete. You tear them down to lift yourself up. It’s all wrong.

Matt12.34

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“For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good things, and an evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth evil things. But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” Matthew 12:34b-37

 

 

We are moms. This is a battle of life and death, and the victory is the breath and legacy of our children. We should just fight the good fight. Link arms together when we can, and pull each other up when we’re able. If we see wrong within our orbit of influence, we should not hesitate to speak up; however, often times, we must have built a relationship long before the tragedy to make any real impact in the lives of those whom we speak truth.

If we witness a crime, by all means, stand up for the innocent! Yet, when it comes to men and women we know nothing about, a situation in which we have no first hand knowledge and a location in which we were not present, sometimes, it’s better for everyone involved, including ourselves, to keep quiet, give grace and just pray. Pray for wisdom. Pray for truth. Pray for justice and grace.

Life is hard sometimes, and we all need a friend and a cheerleader to help us along the way!  … Okay, I will end my rant now. Thank you for letting me unload that mess…

 plankeye“And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” Matthew.7:3-5  

 

His Delight

/ The WheatandTares
Over my lifetime, I’ve heard so many people talk about how God is our Father…that He’s really like our “Daddy.” He’s the one who delights in us. He’s the one who thinks we are precious; we are the apple of His eye; we are simply like a treasured child in His sight. He loves us that much.
…I am precious in my Daddy’s sight…
This analogy is great… unless you never had a Dad who delighted in who you were as a child. This is a wonderful illustration for those of understanding; however, for those of us who grew up without a dad present, without a father who showered us with hugs and smiles, without a Daddy who daily convinced us of His love, this picture of a loving Father just doesn’t quite make sense. It doesn’t quite bring the measure of comfort and peace that those who propagate it may wish to convey.
So, how do we translate this kind of love to those with whom a father’s love is foreign? How do we paint a picture of “Daddy’s little girl” or “Dad’s little buddy” to that one whose own father was abusive, neglective or even absent all together? How in the world do we portray this image of a wonderfully, loving father who enjoys seeing His children happy and full of life? The only way I have found to communicate it is by learning about it myself and sharing my life experiences with those whom I encounter.
…He delights in me…
Sometimes, it’s revealed to me by a surprise, tangible blessing like what happened last year on two different occassions: I was on a mad-dash Easter dress hunt the night before Easter. At the very  last minute, I decided I was just going to drop by a store and see if I could find something new. As I was pulling into the parking lot, I had a little prayer conversation with God. I said, “It sure would be nice if I could just walk right in and just a cute pink jacket to go with my pants. I know, I don’t have to have it, and I’m okay with not. I can always wear that old suit I have. I just don’t feel comfortable in it, but it’s really ok, not a big deal.” I went in, looked at one rack, went to next, and there it was. Right size. Right fit. Perfect. Two weeks later, we were at a ladies retreat, and they had a white jacket on display that I just loved! I thought it was so cute. At the end of the retreat, I mentioned this to the lady who owned it, and she handed it right to me. She said, “You enjoy it!”
…I am His precious child…
Sometimes, His delight is shown to me by what others share with me. A widowed friend of mine told me one day, “I am spoiled. I asked Him to help me see Him, and He has. I see the little things He does all around me, the little blessings He does for me everyday, and I feel treasured by my Father. I am cherished by Him.” Another friend was recovering from major surgery. Someone brought her a quilt the very day she returned home, and the person didn’t even know she had had surgery. The quilt was made with scriptures on every square. She said she felt blanketed in The Word while she recovered, and it was a reminder her of God’s love for her. She said, “It was as if in that moment, I could feel Him saying “I love you, you’re my precious child.”
…I am the apple of His eye…
Sometimes, I am simply reassured of His delight in His love for me in nontangible ways…a prayer unanswered, a wound healed, a moment of protection, a feeling of peace through the storm, or a simple reminder of His faithfulness even when I am not. He loves us, and He delights in us, His children. No matter what type of earthly father you may have had during this lifetime, you can be certain that your Heavenly Father loves you more than you could ever imagine! You ARE the apple of His eye. You are His delight!
 
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 “In a desert land he found him, in a barren and howling waste. He shielded him and cared for him; he guarded him as the apple of his eye, like an eagle that stirs up its nest and hovers over its young,
that spreads its wings to catch them and carries them aloft.
The Lord alone led him; no foreign god was with him.”
Deuteronomuy32:10-12

Are You Crafty?

/ The WheatandTares

  

The sign read, “If you work with your hands, your mind and your heart…you are a craftsman.”

So, my question to you today:

Are you a craftsman?

Slippery Slope

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

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We all get angry. Being angry is an emotion. It is a natural emotion that happens when something goes not as planned. It is a part of human nature. Yet, when it becomes a part of your life, a holding which you will not release, and a habit that you simply expect everyone to accept and tolerate, you have entered the slippery slope of failure and eventual disaster.

Anger can be a natural reaction, just as joy, fear and sadness are natural reactions and emotions with which we all live. We can’t truly shut these off, just as we can’t shut off our own breath, without a part of us dying inside. Yet, we can learn to control our anger. We can learn to compress it into submission, and we can choose to embrace joy and life in its place.

Now, let me clarify one thing. There is such a thing as righteous anger, or indignation, and sometimes, you just need to get ill! The Bible tells us in Ephesians 4:26, “Be angry, and do not sin…” There will be moments in our lives when we must get angry against things that are just wrong, people who are bringing harm, or just plain stupidity that has brought about danger. For instance, if a child has been intentionally harmed by an adult, and you simply stand around proclaiming peace and prosperity, you’re the one who needs to wake up. If there are people dying at the hands of another, by all means, get upset. Take the action needed to stop the injustice. The proclamation of peace in war times is foolish and nonsensical! Let’s use some common sense here. I am not talking about anger against injustice, violence and hatred against the innocent. These things should never be tolerated! However, I am talking about unbridled anger that brings about rage and unnecessary harm.

You see, unbridled anger will eventually lead to death, either in ourselves or in someone else. Uncontrolled anger leads to resentment, bitterness and even rage. When you allow anger to rule your life, you are allowing all of these things to follow, not only within you, but around you. It will infiltrate the lives of those around you to the point they must choose to leave you or confront you.

Unbridled Anger is a slippery slope we all must avoid. Choose life. Speak life. Be life to those you encounter. Let that anger slip away to give room for more joy, more love, more forgiveness and hope. If you need help, ask for it. If you need hope, search for it. If you ask the right people, and you seek the right places, you will find it.

“So the Lord said to Cain, ‘Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it.'” Genesis 4:6-7

Daily Prompt: Angry

Do You See A Purpose?

/ The WheatandTares

What is your purpose?

Sometimes, you can dream about your purpose for the future, for the world, for your nation. These dreams are fun, exciting, and if pursued, they can be life changing. Everyone should have a dream and a purpose bigger than they are. When you live your life for a purpose bigger than you, one that is for the greater good of those around you, it’s easier to avoid things like selfishness, arrogance and even self-loathing.

Yet, what do you do when those dreams seem too big, too far or too foreign to the struggle and turmoil of everyday life? What about those lives who are broken and in despair, and the next breath seems too hard to imagine? What about them? What does purpose mean then?

Sometimes, you just have to realize your purpose for the here and now, and set aside those bigger purposes, those bigger dreams for another day. It doesn’t mean those things can’t happen, but when your spouse is lying debilitated in a hospital bed, those “purposes for the future” seem a little farfetched. When your child is suffering from a terminal illness, and you don’t even know if she’ll make it till tomorrow, those “dreams bigger than life” seem a little nonsensical.

At these times, you simply do what comes next, and you do it well. You take care of the one you love and the ones you are with, and you let tomorrow take care of itself. You find purpose in today, in the now, in the value of those around you. That purpose, sometimes, can become greater than any “big purpose” you could find elsewhere.

When things don’t turn out as you imagined, and your purpose seems a little less than you dreamed, just hold on. It doesn’t mean that purpose will never come to fruition. It doesn’t mean your dreams will never be realized. It just means it’s on hold for a little while, and what’s in front of you may need more attention than those “big” things. Your purpose is before you always. Sometimes, you just have to open your eyes to see it.

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“For the vision is yet for an appointed time; But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie.
Though it tarries, wait for it; Because it will surely come, It will not tarry.”  Habakkuk 2:3

 

Daily Prompt: Purpose