Striving to be Kind

I have read so many articles from those declaring we must love the addict, regardless of the hell they bring to you.

We must strive to be kind.

Be loving. Be sincere. Be gracious.

For they are hurting people, simply misunderstood.

I’ve read stories from daughters and sons who were straightforward and blunt with their parental addict.

Yet, once that parent is gone, the adult child grieves the loss and the “lack of love” they gave.

He states, “You never have that moment to return and be helpful.”

She states, “Once they’re gone, you live with the regrets of what you could’ve done, what you should’ve done.”

We must strive to be kind.

Be loving. Be sincere. Be gracious.

For they are hurting people, simply misunderstood.

Well, I personally must disagree with your memes-life approach.

I adamantly oppose your proclamation of fantasy.

Is not true love when we protect those most vulnerable among us?

Is not true sincerity when we call good, good and evil, evil, not the other way around?

Is not true graciousness when we recognize truth as it is and remove danger from the innocent?

I will never argue the merits of forgiveness and grace. That is what we should all give and receive unconditionally.

But truth must be embraced above all else for true healing to come.

Truth doesn’t rescind love.

Truth doesn’t nullify kindness.

Truth will bring recognition, repentance and regeneration.

Truth will bring forgiveness.

Forgiveness doesn’t always equal reconciliation, and grace doesn’t mean tolerance for depravity.

Sometimes, the kindest action of love is confrontation and consequences.

Sometimes, the kindest action of acceptance is refusal of evil and encircling good.

For in confrontation, mending of hearts can begin.

And in consequences, recoiling from harm can start.

So let us never strive for kindness at the expense of truth.

For the truth will always set one free.

And you shall know the truth, and the truthshall make you free.”

John 8:32

Twisted Heart

You say you love me, and my heart twists in a knot.

Butterflies fly and my head is light.

My mind wants to believe, but my heart has been deceived.

So, I pray your words are true while I doubt their veracity.

I find myself desperate for your affections, yet shielding my emotions.

I hear myself reply to your promises with longings of my own,

Yet, I don’t trust you to be faithful.

I don’t trust you to be true.

Why does my heart twist and turn and refuse to accept yours?

Why does my heart twist and turn your words to mean ill-will to mine?

Oh God, forgive my betrayal.

Please, forgive my unbelief.

You are my Creator, my Source, my eternal King.

You are the mender of my heart, untwist this vile thing.

Return me to my first love, and purify my soul to sing.

Penned – MG – 6/13/22

The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can know it?

Jeremiah 17:9

Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Make me hear joy and gladness, That the bones You have broken may rejoice. Hide Your face from my sins, And blot out all my iniquities. Create in me a clean heart, O God, And renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me away from Your presence, And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation, And uphold me by Your generous Spirit.

Psalm 51:7-12

While in the Fire

What do you do while in the fire?

What do say while in the Potter’s hand?

How do you react when your life is being stretched like a rubber band?

Whine, Rage, Hide, Distract, Bite and Rile

Laugh, Rest, Sing, Worship, Serve and Smile

What you find yourself doing in the middle of the storm can determine your promotion or demotion at it’s end.

You will destroy and kill, or you will lead and make a friend.

The choice is yours.

Penned – MG – 6/13/22

But now, O Lord, You are our Father; We are the clay, and You our potter; And all we are the work of Your hand.

Isaiah 64:8

And the vessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter; so he made it again into another vessel, as it seemed good to the potter to make.

Jeremiah 18:4

Refiner’s Fire

The trials of life feel like fire to the heart.

They burn and destroy as a forest ablaze.

They break and bend the impurities of our motives.

They draw out the ugly, unusable parts of our nature to reveal the good.

May we yearn for the heat.

May our hearts long for the fires that will bring forth the beauty of character and purity of the soul.

Let the fires burn.

He will sit as a refiner and a purifier of silver;

He will purify the sons of Levi,

And purge them as gold and silver,

That they may offer to the Lord

An offering in righteousness.

Malachi 3:3

Let It Burn

Sometimes, we’ve got that thing that hinders holding us back.

Sometimes, we’ve got that thing that makes us pause, and it’s slowing us down.

Sometimes, to get rid of it,

You’re gonna have to let it burn.

Fire purifies. It refines.

Fire cleanses. It redefines.

Let it burn away the dross.

Let it burn away the residue.

You will be brought for as precious silver.

You will come forth as brilliant gold.

I will bring the one-third through the fire,

Will refine them as silver is refined,

And test them as gold is tested.

They will call on My name,

And I will answer them.

I will say, ‘This is My people’;

And each one will say, ‘The Lord is my God.’ ”

Zechariah 13:9

But who can endure the day of His coming?

And who can stand when He appears?

For He is like a refiner’s fire

And like launderers’ soap.

He will sit as a refiner and a purifier of silver;

He will purify the sons of Levi,

And purge them as gold and silver,

That they may offer to the Lord

An offering in righteousness.

Malachi 3:2-3

Presence

Be Present

Be present where you are.

People matter.

Be present in the moment.

When you’re grouching on your son, but really, you’re grouchy because you’re still seething from the argument with your man.

When you’re snappy with the cashier, but really, you’re wanting to snap at your little girl who accidentally spilt the chips in aisle 3.

When you’re ill with your neighbor, but really, you’re grouchy because the car seat got ripped; you spilled your coffee, and you just dropped your keys while your arms are full.

Be present where you are.

That little boy is following.

That young lady is watching.

That neighbor is searching.

People matter.

Be present in the moment.

Take your eyes off of you.

Look around and really see.

Open your ears to truly hear.

To everything there is a season,

A time for every purpose under heaven…

Ecclesiastes 3:1

The Daddy-Daughter Dance

February… Oh, how it begins the painful dance of my heart each year.

It’s not that I’m angry. It’s not that I’m hating what I see. It’s just a longing within my once little girl heart that will never be fulfilled.

The beautiful pictures plastered all over social media bring sweet memories never beheld. Precious relationships promising treasured protection and defense for all her days.

His large frame casts a shadow not of harm or destruction but of love and nurture. Her petite form is sheltered, cherished and adored. They stand in parade for all to appreciate and celebrate.

I am thankful for his place in her life. I am grateful for her desire for his strength and fortitude. I truly am.

Yet, my heart breaks time and again for the wee little one standing at the door, her packed bags awaiting his never return. She forms her own dance, spinning, twirling, hoping for his hand; yet, he never extends it.

Someway, somehow, she makes it to the One who holds the key. With tears streaming, hopes shattered and dreams crushed, He takes her into His arms, and swirls her life into a new masquerade where she can smile again and forever more be held where she always wished to be. ❤️

The Lord your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.

Zephaniah 3:17

Parenting 101 – Balance

Joey and I have talked about this from time to time, and as I began to blog this morning, I ran across this thought in one of my notepads.

Thought I’d share it for a parent out there who needs to hear it…

There is a great balance in the weight of parenting. It truly takes both parents to survive.

You’ve got to find your niche. Find your balance. One of you will be good at one thing; the other will be better gifted at others.

Here’s a simple illustration:

One of our sons had a project to be done. It was started late, of course. I helped till midnight. I’m a night owl and pretty detailed. I stayed engaged till the job was done, and for this reason, I was very knowledgable of what was needed for the completion. This isn’t bragging; it’s just the facts as we both could see it.

The next morning, Joey dealt with a cell phone issue for another son. There was no blow up. No arguments. He just prompted the convo, said what needed to be said, and it was done. And honestly, it all came out much smoother than I would have ever made it to be!

It takes two. As parents, you have to figure out your weak spots and allow the other parent to balance you. Be honest. You’re not the best in all things, and neither is he.

You don’t have to be all things to your child. That’s God’s job. Be who He called you to be. Immerse yourself in His gifting.

I can’t scream this loud enough: Stop fighting to be “supermom/superdad.” You’re not created to be all things for all moments. If I could shout this from the mountain tops or paint a thousand billboards to make this message clear, I certainly would.

This isn’t a competition. You don’t have to be the best, nor do you have to demean your spouse to make you look better! You figure out what you can do and learn from your spouse on the rest. You don’t have to be the only hero.

When you struggle to be the hero, you only become a narcissistic hinderance in your child’s life.

Read up on narcissism. I guarantee you. You don’t want to go there! 😉

Happy parenting!

I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.

Psalm 139:14

Your Potential Extension

Potential…

Everyone has potential…

Sometimes, you have to wait on it…

You wait on your potential, wait through your potential and you wait for your potential to arrive. Waiting on your potential to grow and mature can sometimes be exhausting! It can be slow growth with lots of changes and adjustments.

You wait through your potential change and development to arrive at your giftings and abilities.

You wait through your potential shifting to get to your potential extension.

Have you ever met someone who seems to be a “skys the limit” kind of person? It seems they can do anything, be anything they desire, with no limitations?

This is what I’d describe as a potential extension. There is no limit to their potential, because it has extended beyond themselves.

This is where you find yourself awaiting the potential’s arrival or the limit of your potential.

It’s not a “sit down and wait” kind of potential.

It’s not a place of apathy and laziness, “simply growing old and fat,” awaiting your potential.

It’s not a “looking at the clock, awaiting the change to come to you” kind of potential…

It’s a place of pushing, striving and extending your limitations to reach further than you ever have before.

It’s a place of stretching and learning to thrive in your potential as if you have no limitations.

It’s a “how high can I jump and still land on my feet” attitude, a “let me try to fly just once” perspective.

This is your potential extension.

Are you ready for your stretch?

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Philippians 4:13

Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3:12-14

How’s Your Gratitude Gauge?

I’ve heard it said that gratitude brings a peace of mind.

Gratitude can overlook the reality of pain to see the beauty in healing.

Gratitude can glance past what should bring anger and division and see opportunity for change.

Gratitude can turn a blind eye to hardships of transition and see the wonderful chance for new beginnings.

It’s all in our perspective.

It’s all in how we respond.

Gratitude can bring rest for a weary soul and relief for an entrenched heart.

Gratitude is not simple words of flattery and conceit.

Gratitude is found in actions, in heartfelt reactions, in a lifestyle of humility and honor.

Take a look in the mirror today and see if gratitude is on your lips.

Take a moment to breathe deep before you speak and see if gratitude is threaded through the words.

Take a survey of those around you to see if they recognize gratitude in your life.

And never take for granted the thousand tiny miracles all around you that call for gratitude from all of you.

Penned 1/8/22 – MG

Oh, give thanks to the Lord! Call upon His name; Make known His deeds among the peoples!

1 Chronicles 16:8

Oh, give thanks to the Lord, for He is good! For His mercy endures forever.

1 Chronicles 16:34