relationship

You’re Worth It!

/ The WheatandTares / 4 Comments

Somebody who is reading this right now needs to read that quote again:

Your worth is not determined by someone’s ability to appreciate it.

Too many of us live in a place of less than because we’re looking for someone’s approval, someone’s appreciation, even when we deny that reality.

We walk around every day stating we don’t need someone else’s admiration; yet, one slight deviation in their behavior, and we’re a wreck.

We puff our chests out like a peacock with the confidence to scale the highest height; yet, one small disagreement, and we melt under the weight of feeling we will never measure up.

So, if this is you today, scroll back up and read that quote one more time:

Your worth is not determined by someone’s ability to appreciate it.

I know. I’m still rereading it, too.

We will grow together. We will stretch together. And we will read this together until we get it.

Words often bounce around in the brain, and although, you’ve read them and comprehend the language, it might take longer to understand it within your heart.

You are enough.

You’re not too much or too little.

You’re not over the top or under the bar level.

You’re not pressing too deep or living too shallow.

You are enough.

And how do I know this?

Because He tells me so.

And that is enough.

Now, to just read that quote one more time.

I might truly get it this time around…

Your worth is not determined by someone’s ability to appreciate it!

For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
I will praise You, for I am fearfully andwonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.

Psalm 139:13-14

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Romans 5:8

What does it mean to be Tempered??

/ The WheatandTares / Leave a comment

Being in the church culture these days, I hear much said about what a Christian should or shouldn’t say, how a Christian should or shouldn’t respond.

There’s always a new vantage point, a new opinion they needs to be heard, and typically, there will be two or three in oration at various times, even if these are in opposition to one another.

So, who is right and who is wrong?

Who are we to listen to?

Who are we to follow?

Well, for Jesus followers, the answer is abundantly clear, or at least, it would be argued that it “should be.”

Yet, even in the Church Body, there are varying opinions, beliefs and denominations that cause us all to land at various points of standards concerning any one given “biblical rule.”

So again, who is right and who is wrong?

Who are we to listen to?

Who are we to follow?

We definitely need to start in the Word of God. If you claim to be a Jesus follower, that truly should be your book of preference for daily living and lifestyle.

And then, we definitely should start with the life of Christ. If He’s your main guy, then mirroring His examples will definitely be helpful.

And finally, starting with the specific things God loves (there are seven actually listed in specificity), and maybe the greatest commandments of which Jesus Himself spoke might be great beginning.

By the time I do these three suggestions to their fullness, it’s usually bedtime, and I don’t have a lot more time to add more opinions or fingers to point toward all the things everyone might be getting wrong.

Maybe we should all take a step back and begin again.

Maybe we should all take a moment in front of the mirror and take a really long, hard look inside.

Maybe we should grab His love letter to us and begin reading for what it has for US and to convince US instead of all it doesn’t have for THEM and has to condemn THEM.

And maybe, just maybe, by the time we do these three things, we will have given enough time for Him to begin to change us from the inside out.

And then, maybe there will begin to be a whole lot less wrong AMONG US, and we can become a whole lot more effective FOR HIM…

But when the Pharisees heard that He had silenced the Sadducees, they gathered together. Then one of them, a lawyer, asked Him a question, testing Him, and saying, “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?” Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lordyour God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.”

Matthew 22:34-40

And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

Matthew 7:3-5

Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes from thornbushes or figs from thistles? Even so, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit.A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Therefore by their fruits you will know them.

Matthew 7:15-20

Flame Walker, Fire Journey

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

There are moments in life when reality settles in. When the hard work of living pauses for just a moment, and you’re able to look back and recognize where you’ve been, what’s been accomplished, and where you’re going.

There comes a time when you realize some sacrifices were necessary to carry on; some were foolish, and still more were simply necessary for survival.

Then, there’s that season of recognition when the fear of the pain is passed, the apathy of the seared feelings has diminished, and all that is left is the confidence of your preservation.

When you’ve walked through the flames of life, innocence may be lost and intimidation may be vanquished, but the growth and strength that rises cannot be denied.

So, walk on, my friend. Walk on.

Be a flame walker. Take the fiery journey.

You can endure.

And then, go and rescue someone from that same inferno.

But you, beloved, building yourselves up on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life. And on some have compassion, making a distinction; but others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire, hating even the garment defiled by the flesh.

Jude 1:20-23

Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, and to present you faultless
Before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy, To God our Savior,
Who alone is wise,
Be glory and majesty,
Dominion and power,
Both now and forever.
Amen.

Jude 1:24-25

Learning to Forgive

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It’s easy to tell someone to forgive until you’re the one who is wronged.

It easy to tell someone to forgive until you’re the one who is falsely accused.

It’s easy to urge that one to forgive until it’s your baby who’s wounded.

It’s easy to urge that one to forgive until it’s your baby who’s wrenching in pain.

It’s easy to say forgive when it’s not you seeking justice.

It’s easy to say forgive when it’s not you seeking revenge.

But when it is you…

But when it is yours…

But when it is all encompassed in your house, your home, your heart…

That’s when the Golden Rule isn’t so clear.

That‘s when the “seventy times seventy” is harder to reciprocate.

Yet, He said it for a reason.

He said it for your freedom.

He said it for your release.

For when you truly forgive, regardless of the apology, that is when you are truly free.

Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.”

Matthew 18:21-22

For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

Matthew 6:14-15

Friendships Worth Keeping

/ The WheatandTares

Sometimes, we hang onto friendships that are so shallow, they are never beneficial in the difficult season of life.

Sometimes, we keep close those friends who are fun and exciting, but the depth to their soul leaves a gaping hole in our tragic moments.

Sometimes, we nurture the relationships that are too toxic, worrisome or meaningless and we let the truthful, deep and most important ones slip through our fingers like grains of sand.

Take a minute today to look around you.

Reevaluate. Take a deeper glance.

See who’s there and who needs to be.

Cherish those who will walk through fire with you.

Treasure those who will pull you out of the fire.

And chase after those who are carrying the torched lamp into your darkness when you can’t see.

Don’t let them get out of your sight.

A friend loves at all times,
And a brother is born for adversity.

Proverbs 17:17

Knee Deep Waters

/ The WheatandTares

There’s a song by Kathy Mattae, “Standing Knee Deep In A River.” She talks about friendships that we take for granted, and we let them slip on by.

As I grow older, I realize this is a hard truth that many of us either recognize early enough to rescue the few that may remain, or we acknowledge way too late that they’re already gone.

Friendships that are found to be easy and never have “a bump in the road,” a confrontation, or a season where questions arise if it’s really worth it to keep going, are truthfully, not those knee deep waters.

Knee deep water is when you can still jump around and splash, but one slip, and you’ll be under water fast.

Knee deep water is when you can still feel secure in your footing, but let the current get a little faster, and that footing will be tested and reevaluated.

Knee deep water is when you can choose to go a little deeper, explore a little more, or you can choose to step back in the shallow, safer waters and not take the risk.

Knee deep waters is when real friendships learn to survive.

Friendships that are made to last will be found more valuable and cherished when those waters rise.

What kind of friendships are you keeping today?

It might be one that will be a lifeline to your survival tomorrow…

A man who has friends must himself be friendly,
But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

Proverbs 18:24

Monday Fun

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

Sometimes, especially on Monday mornings, you’ve got to remind yourself whose circus you’ll attend and whose monkeys you’ll attempt to tame.

Sometimes, especially on Mondays, you need to remind yourself that only your circus is worth watching and certainly only one due your hard earned money (time and effort) for the tickets.

And sometimes, especially on a Monday, you’ll have to remind yourself that although, those monkeys at that other person’s circus might look entertaining, rest assured…

THEY WILL EAT YOU ALIVE!!

Get out while you still can and go tame your own raucous monkeys!

Happy Monday!

He who passes by and meddles in a quarrel not his own Is like one who takes a dog by the ears.

Proverbs 26:17

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

Matthew 6:33-34

Know Who Your Friends Are

/ The WheatandTares

Too many people in this world bite, ridicule and wound those closest to them who care the most.

Too many people in this world viciously attack the ones who love them the most because they’re willing to speak truth.

Too many people don’t know who their friends are and walk away from the best.

Too many people embrace the toxic, the loud, and the angry, believing because “they’re family,” that’s what they’re suppose to do.

Too many people hold onto a bloodline that kicks them around and demands they be a doormat when they should say goodbye and not look back.

Too many people keep close those whom should be released and let go of those whom should be captivated.

Look around. Evaluate. Be honest.

Don’t stay out of obligation, fear or routine.

Don’t walk away out of rage, envy or apathy.

Open your eyes to see clearly and hear with precision.

Make wise choices, and make calculated decisions.

You can do this.

And the next generation is depending on you to do it right.

They are watching and waiting.

Now when he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. Saul took him that day, and would not let him go home to his father’s house anymore. Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul. And Jonathan took off the robe that was on him and gave it to David, with his armor, even to his sword and his bow and his belt.

1 Samuel 18:1-4

Everyone Has a Prison

/ The WheatandTares

No matter who you are, where you came from, where you’re going,

We all have a prison to live in.

It may be your career, your education, your ambition that demands your concentration, your dedication.

It may be your possessions, your economic status, your greed for more that commands your toil, your allegiance.

There is a prison, and it beckons your name.

It may be your pain, your heartache, your past that haunts your thoughts, your recollections.

It may be your anger, your temper, your impulse that forces your allegiance, your agreement.

There is a prison, and the door is open wide.

It may be your children, your spouse, your family that claims your devotion, your approval.

It may be your health, your well-being, your countenance that orders your commitment, your adherence.

It may even be a wall of bars you’ve allowed someone else to control the size, the depth, the yielding of your attendance that confines your submission and your surrender.

We all have a prison waiting, which one will you choose?

You can also decide love, joy, peace, and goodness will be your eternal home.

This prison will bring more freedom than you can ever imagine.

Then, you’ll want to lock the door and throw away the key.

Choose well. For once the latch is turned, you may never leave your abiding cage…

And if it seems evil to you to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

Joshua 24:15

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.

Galatians 6:7

Lock the Door

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments
I do not own or possess this pic. Google search.

Ok, so this meme is posted to be funny, and I hope you’re laughing.

But honestly, there’s a little bit of truth here, and realistically, on both sides.

We can’t go around “locking people out” of our lives every time we dislike what they say or do.

Yet, for our own well being, there may be times that we need to lock that door.

If you’re feeling quick to agree or disagree with me, I’ll urge you to pause.

Your feelings of justification or accusation may not be accurate once you hear my thoughts…

In this culture we are living, it seems everyone can be offended, and everyone is demanding tolerance and acceptance.

In this modern society, everyone screams to “let me be me,” and if “you don’t, you hate me!”

Candidly speaking, this is a dumb statement on both ends of the spectrum.

If you are in the camp of those who are quick to gain offense and demand acceptance, in actuality, you are forcing that of me, but yet, I’m not allowed to do the same of you (because then, I’d be intolerant).

If you are in the camp who states emphatically that my disagreement proves my hatred, then in reality, you have just pointed the finger to the very thing you are doing to me (because now you are “hating on” me).

Both responses are unfair and unreasonable.

Both reactions are illogical and quite biased.

If you are truly desiring relationship, these expectations are one sided and selfish, and they only bring toxins and codependency.

If you are truly looking for companionship, these pressures are pompous and even narcissistic, and they only bring death and destruction.

If you are truly seeking connection, then you’ve got to have some give and take.

If you are truly pursuing friendship, then you’ve got to become less demanding and a little more understanding.

And this is when the decision to open the door or close it becomes essential.

Not because we need to go around locking out every controlling or domineering person we encounter,

And not because we become people of the Igor rules and regulations; there must be second chances for mercy to flow.

But rather, we need to open the door wide to those who welcome, warm, refresh, strengthen and challenge the heart.

And we need to close it to those who demean, ridicule, imprison and manipulate the soul.

Learning when to lock the door and expand it takes a lifetime of wisdom, love and self-control.

Learning takes a lifetime of failing and succeeding.

It’s a hard lesson, but it is attainable.

It’s a arduous journey, but it is worth it.

Can two walk together, unless they are agreed?

Amos 3:3

Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”

1 Corinthians 15:33

Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. Therefore, “If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
If he is thirsty, give him a drink;
For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Romans 12:17-21