What you seek, you will find, when you seek it with all your heart.
What you seek, you will find, when you seek it with no bounds.
If it’s religion, you’ll find tradition and law.
If it’s fame and fortune, you’ll find self gratification and temporary pleasures.
If it’s academics, you’ll find knowledge and affluence.
If it’s philosophy, you’ll find a wisdom and deeper meanings.
Yet, in all of these things, you will still find an emptiness, a void, a vast domain within your soul that cannot be filled.
But if you’ll seek a relationship with the One who created it all,
You will be filled.
…that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height— to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
Ephesians 3:17-19
Jesus answered and said to her, “Whoever drinks of this water will thirst again, but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life.”
Principles to live by… well, that can be a long list, I guess. But to sum it all up, I suppose the principle that all the rest would fall under would be a principle of love. Yet, if I start describing this in detail, it might look a little different than the societal demand for love these days.
In our current culture, there seems to be a demand to show love by accepting a certain opinion as truth. Or the demand might be that if I disagree with you, then, I’m not showing love but hatred.
Or if I’m not giving you what you want, then I’m not showing love. Or maybe if I’m not giving up something I want, or maybe I’m not suffering in a certain way, then I’m not showing the kind of love I’m supposed to be showing.
Pure, unadulterated love is sacrificial, gracious, and compassionate; yet, it is also full of truth, strength and courage.
True, unblemished love is is not one of these without the other. It is both.
If a parent loves his or her child but allows that child to run in the street to play while the truck is barreling down the path, is that really love?
If a spouse declares his love yet leaves and showers everyone else with his affections because he wants more, is that really love?
If a friend promises to share love and friendship yet breaks every confidence because she wants her liberty to share, is that really love?
If a child proclaims his love to his parents yet steals and destroys because he wants his freedom to live as he pleases, is that really love?
True love will rejoice in the truth, will bear all things, will believe all things, will hope all things, and will endure all things. Love never fails.
And love is impossible without abiding in the Only One who gave true love.
So, what principles define how I live? I guess I could begin with 1 Corinthians 13. I certainly don’t live it perfectly, but I strive toward it daily, only by seeking Him first.
Because He loved me first, now only can I begin to truly love.
Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing. Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. … And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?
The best piece of advice would actually be two statements given by different people, but the statements work together:
It takes 1,000 tiny miracles to make a marriage work.
Marriage will only last best when Christ is at the center.
These might sound a bit cliche, and if you don’t have a relationship with Christ; then, it might not even make sense to you. Or if you’ve “been a Christian but everything went wrong in my marriage/in life,” then, it might be a difficult concept for you to accept.
Let me say this loud and clear and long:
Just because the statement did not/does not ring true in your own life, does not make the statement untrue.
That’s why these two statements work so well together. It truly takes a 1,000 tiny miracles to get the right two people together, at the right time, in the right location, under the right circumstances, and in the right context, in the right season for each.
Much more is it tiny miracles that keep those two love birds together over time. After all, he is marrying a woman. And she is marrying a man. Imagine that. Lol. They think differently, act differently, speak differently, react differently, even feel differently. How in the world can that work?
And that’s where God comes in. He is the Creator of our very lives. He designed every part of us and breathed breath into our lungs. How could He not be the miracles working within our lives? But there’s one caveat. He allows us to have the freewill of choice.
You heard me right. He’s the Almighty, great Creator of heaven and earth and all that we see. He is the Master Designer of all creation and of the intricate, complex beings called humans. He is the Alpha Omega, the Beginning and the End, meaning He can create and finish life and everything in it and around it.
Yet, He in His ultimate design, He gives us the ability to choose. We can choose Him or not. We can choose love or hate. We can choose life or death. We get the beautiful freedom of choice.
And what we do with that choice will determine the beautiful finality of those 1,000 tiny miracles that it takes to make a marriage work. What we do in choosing determines where we end up in life and who we end up with. What we do with the choices determines how we think, how we speak, how we act, interact and react, and it determines how we live our lives.
Every. Single. Day.
Every. Single. Minute of that Day.
Every. Single. Second of that Minute of that Day.
These choices don’t automatically make us somehow perfect. They don’t make us sinless. But if we’re daily choosing Christ and the things of Him, it will make us seek perfection, and it will make us sin less. And if two people are seeking, choosing, sacrificing and loving in these ways, it surely helps to support and strengthen a healthy union.
So, what will you choose?
Or better yet, WHO will you choose?
And if it seems evil to you to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
John C. Maxwell says, “Leadership is influence.” So, when the question is posed, “Do you see yourself as a leader?”, the answer for all of us should actually be, “Yes.”
The question should rather be, “Who are you leading?” And “Where are you leading them?”
If you are like me, and you call yourself a Christian, we should be leading others to Christ. Not to a religion. Not to church. Not to a “feel better” lifestyle. Not to a program or to a group of people. But we should be leading others to a relationship with Jesus.
All of those other things might come with the territory, and if we truly have a relationship with Jesus and actually read His Word, many of those things will fall into line. But the relationship is where it’s at. And if you have that relationship, you will have influence. And if you have influence, per John Maxwell, you will be a leader.
And even if you don’t claim Jesus as your Savior, or maybe you declare you’re not into “all that religious stuff,” you’ll still be leading someone somewhere. And again, I’ll insert the question, “Where are you leading them?”
If you have no leader yourself, and you have no foundation of truth, than your path will be quite a crooked one. And in this modern age, a crooked path can simply be foolish and quite frankly, dangerous. For there are buyers for your soul on every street corner, both physically and metaphorically. And typically, the highest bidder will win.
But at what cost? And are you willing to gamble your life upon it? Or better yet, are you willing to gamble with the most innocent among you? Or maybe even better to ask, what about the ones you love the most? Are they worth the precarious journey in your lack of leadership?
Whether you decide to choose or not, it will be decided. Refusal to answer is still an answer, and it will still bring consequences.
What personality trait in people raises a red flag with you?
Rudeness is a personality trait that raises a red flag for me almost immediately. You can be aggravated and not rude. You can be inconvenienced and not rude. You can even be mad and ticked off and still not rude.
Being rude is simply disrespect and apathy flowing out of your mouth and attitude toward someone else. Being rude is a lack of caring who’s around you or how you might be perceived.
Now, look. I’m not setting myself on a high horse and pretending I’ve never been rude. And it’s also not a “make it or break it” attitude for our relationship. We can all have bad days, and we can all make mistakes.
But if you walk around in life believing it’s your prerogative to be rude anytime you like and to anyone whom you dare, then, we’re going to have a problem.
If you believe it’s your God-given right to be rude to the elderly or to children, that’s when you and I aren’t going to get along.
And if you sincerely feel you’ve earned the privilege to be rude simply because you’re too young to know better or too old to care, then, we probably just can’t be friends.
And if you carry on that way long enough in my presence, I’ll even say something to you, retaliate with a bit of rudeness myself, or simply walk away and leave you to your fate.
Rudeness is never a right of passage nor an achievement of greatness.
It is just what it is: RUDE!
And just in case you’re wondering, speaking truth is not being rude, but there are also plenty of opportunities to speak truth firmly and strongly without being rude.
It actually takes more courage to be right and truthful andnot be rude.
And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise.
A better question for me might be, “What doesn’t bring a tear of joy to my eye?” Is here are so many things in my life that bring me joy, and I am very much like my grandmother; so, tears come easily around here. Haha.
But seriously. There are some particular things that bring tears of joy to my eyes…
Our guys are probably at the top of the list. These guys just make me so proud to be called their mom. They are working hard to make a place in this life for themselves, becoming responsible, doing well in school, striving to be good, strong men. Most of all, they both have hearts that seek wholeheartedly after God, and not because “mom and dad believe.” That Scripture (paraphrased), “…work our your salvation with fear and trembling,” that’s what they do. They debate it, think about it, search scripture and history, and surround themselves with leaders who can speak into their lives. These guys. Yeah, they bring tears of pure joy to my eyes.
My main guy does this for me, too. He’s simply amazing. Even on days when I’m at my worst, and maybe I’m grouching on him for something that is certainly NOT his fault, he still loves me. He still cares. He works hard in life, at work and at home, all to provide safety, comfort and strength for us. He gives more of himself than I deserve, and I’m forever thankful. Most of all, he’s a man after God’s own heart, and he’s helped to raise our guys to be the same. He’s also shown me who Christ is by the man he lives to be.
And I know. You may be sitting there reading this, thinking, “Yeah, right.” You can’t have perfection, or maybe you’re just blind. Well, I’m not telling a fairytale, but I might as well be living one. No. Of course, we’re not perfect, but that’s what makes the 1,000 tiny miracles that make a marriage work so very special.
And last but definitely not least, my God brings tears of joy to my eyes. When I look at a waterfall and hear the waters rushing by, I can hear His voice on the waters telling of His goodness. When I hike a mountain and look out over a summit, I can feel His faithfulness to me overwhelming. Even when I sit and pet my cat and hear him purr, I can remember He cares even about the smallest of things, and this then, confirms His love again and again.
When these events occur, tears of joy and gratitude fill my eyes to overflowing as I feel the warmth of His loving care.
Tears of joy, they are good for you and me.
The purer the source, the clearer the tears.
You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
What was the last thing you searched for online? Why were you looking for it?
These questions are always so interesting to be answered, and it’s even more intriguing to wonder if the answer is completely true or maybe just one of the recent searches in the the day.
When asked what was the last thing I searched online, my first thought was so I really want to answer that prompt? Because sometimes, the search can be so random, and something I wouldn’t normally search.It can be something someone brought up into a conversation, or a word I heard but didn’t know the meaning, or even a place I hear mentioned, and I’m wondering its location.
So, when I’m asked what’s the last thing I searched online and why were you looking for it, I secretly sneak over to my history tabs to see what I might find before I choose to answer. And then, I wonder do you want to know the last, last thing, or rather do you want to know the last interesting thing?
The last lady search is a bit random because I saw some friends advertise other acquaintances in a play locally; so, I searched the characters of Steel Magnolias to see what characters they might be playing. It’s been so long since I actually watched that movie, I couldn’t even remember the whole storyline, much less the characters’ character.
Then, the last thing before that, which would be what I actually answer as my prompt was something I was researching to speak about in a meeting: Matthew 5:13-16.
This is the Scripture about salt & light. If you’re a believer like me, we have this directive, to be salt and light to the world around us. And this scripture is so descriptive and so instructional that when I read it and then, think of where we are today in our world, it almost makes me sad…and convicted.
Now, if you’re not a Christ believer, as I am, this might not apply to you, but if you call yourself a person of faith in any way, this has our names written all over it! This was Jesus speaking to his disciples and all those who chose to listen to Him on the Mount of Olives. This is the same time frame when He gave us the famous Beatitudes that everyone loves to quote and preach to others of how we should live.
But these scriptures get a little more pointed, a little more laser focused on our personal lives and how we should be living them. This word brings it home to where all of us live.
We are to be salt. Salt of the earth. Salt brings flavor. Salt brings preservation. Salt brings health. Salt can also bring destruction. If you do more research, there’s lots of debate on what Christ meant when He told us to be the salt.
Instead of debating, I’d say He might have meant all of the above. Let me break it down a little…
Be salt that brings flavor to the world around you. Bring kindness, love, faith and hope.
Be salt that brings preservation. Preservation of the Truth. Preservation of His Word. Preservation of His Name and of all that He is.
Be salt that brings health. We, as humans, must have a measure of salt to be healthy. We, as Christians, must bring a measure of hope to bring health to those around us.
Be the salt that brings destruction. Not destruction of good but rather of evil. Bring destruction to lies, hypocrisy and evil intent against the innocent. Bring destruction to the deconstruction of faith, holiness and all things right, true and good.
Be the salt.
Being the light is a bit easier to comprehend. But for sake of congruency, I’ll break this down a little, too.
We are to be the light that shines in the darkness. We are the light that sits on a hill. We are the light that cannot be hidden. We are to be the light that transform the dark.
Light shines in the dark to protect from predators; so, protect the innocent and those without a voice.
Light shines in the dark to brighten a path; so, bring joy to someone else.
Light shines in the dark to lighten a room and dispel a fear; so, bring peace to another.
Light shines in the dark to expose the shadows; so, bring confrontations of truth to break deceptions and lies.
Light shines in the dark to lead the way; so, guide all you find to a better tomorrow.
You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men.
“You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lamp stand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men,that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.
The pain, the hardships, the struggles, they can all feel like piercing thorns that stab and poke into your most vulnerable moments.
The difficulties, the mishaps and failures can become like so many briars and dry patches that never seem to end.
But if I could encourage you today…
If I could give you one thought…
Blossom amongst the thistles.
Flourish amongst the bramble.
Don’t allow your circumstances to steal your beauty.
Don’t allow the heartache and brokenness to squelch your lovely fragrance and striking brilliance.
Bloom until you thrive and show the world there’s still elegance despite afflictions.
The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me, Because the Lord has anointed Me To preach good tidings to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to the captives, And the opening of the prison to those who are bound; To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, And the day of vengeance of our God; To comfort all who mourn, To console those who mourn in Zion, To give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified.”
I am a licensed psychologist based in Greece. My love for housekeeping has inspired me to create this blog about home management and family relationships. I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing!
Dedicated to movie nerdom, nostalgia, and the occasional escape. In the late 90s, I worked at Blockbuster Video, where they let me take home two free movies a day. I caught up on the classics and reviewed theatrical releases for Denver 'burbs newspapers and magazines. While raising two young, beautiful daughters with my amazing wife, I look forward to anything rated R and not Bluey. Comments and dialogue encouraged!
the grizzle grist mill 