choice

Take The Good With The Bad…

/ The WheatandTares

I went for a walk the other day, actually two days in a row, and I caught a glimpse of beautiful sunsets both nights. The pictures I was able to capture just really didn’t do great justice to the reality of the moments because they were truly breathtaking.

Yet literally 2 minutes before each of these sunsets, I ran into this. Both nights. Almost in the same place. Had I not been on high alert, watching each night, those moments could have ended so differently…

The first night, I looked down, saw that little guy almost under my foot. And I jumped over him like a gazelle! Talk about an adrenaline rush. I turned around just to make sure it wasn’t a stick I’d imagined. Nope. It was real. He looked at me with his menacing, beady little eye. I laughed at myself minutes later, thinking if anyone had seen me, they might have wondered if I just had a sudden hurdle-jumping-imagination. Haha. Surely, they couldn’t see what I saw right there on the pavement.

The second night, right about the same time, I was looking and searching, just to make sure there wasn’t another. Lo and behold, there he was again. Pretty sure it was the same little guy. I walked clear around him this time and circled back, thinking he must be dead and just simply stuck on the road. Nope. He turned his head to look my way. I skedaddled quickly out of range.

Got the pictures to prove it, though. And you better believe that third night, I went way on the other side of the road. Nope. I’m not gonna give him a chance at “three times a charm” to strike me! I actually don’t think he was still there, but nope. Not gonna take a chance!

However, here is my whole point in this story: I have a choice to dwell on the beauty of the sunset or the anxiety producing copperhead. I can think about the endless possibilities of running into that little game changer again, or I can reminisce about those golden pink streaked skies and search for another awestruck evening. It’s my choice.

And that’s exactly how life is. There’s always going to be good and bad. There always going to be days when everything seems to be beautiful, and we feel like we are “topping trees.” And then, there’s gonna be others when we’d like to be buried under those trees. Those marks on our calendar will appear when we wish they’d never have come to us and when we’d like to see them never come again.

And every single time, we will have a choice to decide what and where we will place our focus. We get to determine what stays in our realm of contemplations and what we toss out.

And what stays often establishes what we see tomorrow and the next day and the next.

See, even though that third day, I cautiously walked on the other side of the road, even though I might have fought a little internal flutter of trepidation, I was intentionally going to look for that setting sun to show out just a little brighter. And just as I got ready to go chasing that sunset, my eye caught movement up on the little incline. Right about the place that mean ol’ juvenile was the night before…

(A little out of focus, but a sweet memory still.)

Had I stayed away out of fear, walked by too quickly out of anxiety, or just simply looked away to avoid the horror, I would’ve missed this new little guy who came along to visit.

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things arejust, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things. The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you.

Philippians 4:8-9

You will keep him in perfect peace,
Whose mind is stayed on You,
Because he trusts in You.

Isaiah 26:3

Distance From Stupid

/ The WheatandTares

Distancing yourself from stupid people requires fortitude and repetition.

I’d have to say distancing yourself from dramatic people is even more essential

For often, stupidity and drama seem to go hand in hand, and these seem to multiply when you’re not looking.

But if you’ll take a moment to assess your surrounding and evaluate your relationships, stupidity and dramatic response can be weeded out and set apart.

You just must decide if you want peace or attention and popularity.

If peace is your goal, then the distance is an easier trek than if your desire is to people please.

If peace is your ambition, you will embrace it with vigor and pursue it with passion.

And where peace abides, stupidity and drama are closed out by the gates of solitude and tranquility, and shadowed by an overwhelming shield of calm.

So truly, the decision lies within your making.

What do you seek?

Peace or chaos.

It’s yours to choose.

You will keep him in perfect peace,
Whose mind is stayed on You,
Because he trusts in You.

Isiah 26:3

What’s Your Plan?

/ The WheatandTares

Create an emergency preparedness plan.

Creating an emergency preparedness plan will be determined by which emergency it might be.

Is it flood, fire, water spout? Is it earthquake, tornado, or tsunami?

If you’re rising high to avoid the flood plains, the tornado is going to call your name. If you’re digging under to avoid the quake, the tsunami might find its way through the tunnel. If spreading waves to avoid the flames, the water spout might feel too comfortable to join.

Emergency Preparedness Plans must be in tact for all disasters; yet, one plan is often over looked and forgotten.

What about your heart? Does your heart have an emergency preparedness plan?

This one isn’t really complicated. It doesn’t take a lot of time nor do you have to buy a thing.

Just have a little talk with Jesus. Tell Him all about your troubles. Repent of your sins, and believe.

That’s it. It’s that easy.

And you’ll be prepared for life.

You’ll be ready for anything they might come!

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

John 3:16

Healing Processes

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

There is so much truth to this statement that it’s almost difficult to add anything to it.

Too often, we continually try to change people to fit what we need, or better yet, we work hard to “lead them” to a better place to accommodate who we are and who we are becoming.

But people are people.

You might can lead them well, and when that is feasible, by all means, carry on. But when it is someone who is bringing constant harm to you or to someone you love, be careful giving your time. Because you’re also giving your love, your thoughts, and eventually someone else’s flesh more than just your own.

When it’s toxicity, abuse, or dysfunction we’re talking about, step back and evaluate what you’re truly letting go of:

Peace of mind. Peace in your home.

Love in your heart. Love in your surroundings.

Sanity. Sanity in your loved ones.

If these things are given up for the sake of family, friendship , or other relationships, is it really worth it?

Sometimes, you have to hear what someone is saying, see what they are doing, and understand they are who they are. This is a a choice. And you f it doesn’t line up with the peace, love and sanity you need for your life and for those within your charge, then by all means,

Step away.

You both will be better for it.

As a dog returns to his own vomit,
So a fool repeats his folly.
Do you see a man wise in his own eyes?
There is more hope for a fool than for him.

Proverbs 26:11-12

No Good Reason

/ The WheatandTares / 4 Comments

For some people, there will be no good answer.

For some behavior, there will be no good reason.

For some things, there is no good explanation.

For some are just wrong, just bad, just inexcusable.

Stop trying to justify the evil.

Stop attempting to rationalize the nefarious acts.

In your explication, enablement is all that can be found.

Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight!

Isaiah 5:20-21

Weights to Carry

/ The WheatandTares / 4 Comments

We all have a weight to carry.

No matter where we go, what we do, or who we are.

Some choose to carry more, and others believe they’re not choosing to carry any, which that, in and of itself, is a weight to carry.

Those who choose to carry the weight have the ability to decide what they carry and what they let go.

Those who choose to carry the weight have the right to be confident in the fight; they have the right to be indignant of those who won’t.

Those who believe they’re not choosing by their silence and their apathy are truly choosing to drop the weight onto another.

Those who believe they’re not choosing by their lack and their contrived kindness are simply creating a cadence to condone the wrong.

Some choose to carry the weight with dignity, integrity, and strength, and they give their power to the masses.

And those who don’t only add the weight to the ones who choose.

Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Galatians 6:2

You Lead. You Influence

/ The WheatandTares / 4 Comments

Do you see yourself as a leader?

John C. Maxwell says, “Leadership is influence.” So, when the question is posed, “Do you see yourself as a leader?”, the answer for all of us should actually be, “Yes.”

The question should rather be, “Who are you leading?” And “Where are you leading them?”

If you are like me, and you call yourself a Christian, we should be leading others to Christ. Not to a religion. Not to church. Not to a “feel better” lifestyle. Not to a program or to a group of people. But we should be leading others to a relationship with Jesus.

All of those other things might come with the territory, and if we truly have a relationship with Jesus and actually read His Word, many of those things will fall into line. But the relationship is where it’s at. And if you have that relationship, you will have influence. And if you have influence, per John Maxwell, you will be a leader.

And even if you don’t claim Jesus as your Savior, or maybe you declare you’re not into “all that religious stuff,” you’ll still be leading someone somewhere. And again, I’ll insert the question, “Where are you leading them?”

If you have no leader yourself, and you have no foundation of truth, than your path will be quite a crooked one. And in this modern age, a crooked path can simply be foolish and quite frankly, dangerous. For there are buyers for your soul on every street corner, both physically and metaphorically. And typically, the highest bidder will win.

But at what cost? And are you willing to gamble your life upon it? Or better yet, are you willing to gamble with the most innocent among you? Or maybe even better to ask, what about the ones you love the most? Are they worth the precarious journey in your lack of leadership?

Whether you decide to choose or not, it will be decided. Refusal to answer is still an answer, and it will still bring consequences.

So, choose, my friend.

And lead on.

I pray you will choose and lead well.

Prison of Memories

/ The WheatandTares / 5 Comments

For years, I’ve heard of the movie Good Will Hunting. I’ve tried to watch it on air flights every chance I got. But the unedited version just turned me off after the first maybe 5 mins. Forgive me. I’m weird like that, but I just don’t get into a lot of foul language and crude conversations. I’m not a big movie watcher anyway; so, I don’t care to waste my time…

But my husband had first watched it on an edited flight many years ago and had been referencing it for one situation or another all this time. I wanted to watch it so bad, I was almost tempted just to forgo my personal standards and just watch it anyway. Well, he told me the other day he’d had the tv edited version on our recordings for a while now, and he didn’t realize I’d wanted to watch it so bad. Lol.

So, we finally found time to sit down to watch it, and Wow. If you’ve not seen this. You need to. Of course, I would definitely encourage the edited version. Ha.ha. But anyway.

Without being a spoiler, let’s just say this little statement above came alive and well in the middle of the story, and I just balled my eyes out! Geez. I’m so glad I was in the privacy of my own home with only my husband to see me crying like a blubbering idiot and not on a plane where a whole bunch of strangers would wonder what in the world was my problem!

Some days the memories still knock the wind out of me.

And that’s just the honest truth of life, isn’t it?

It doesn’t really matter if it’s past pain, grief, brokenness or shame. When the memories come up, it doesn’t matter how deep you’ve stuffed them down, or how far beneath the surface you think you’ve buried them.

They’re going to slam into your heart like a tsunami.

They’re going to run through your mind like a twister seeking a place to land.

They’re going to roll over your soul like a freight train.

There’s no real stopping them.

You might as well stop the denial. And you might as well not try to run. Cuz they’ll chase you down and beat you, or they’ll just lie in wait for you at your next destination.

Memories don’t go away like a vapor in the wind.

They are like the fragrance on that wind, choosing when to come and when to go.

Claiming no responsibility and receiving no accountability.

Never giving forwarning of their arrival nor a wave to their departure.

They just are and forever will be.

It’s better to embrace, evaluate, excavate and even let them exuberate.

Otherwise, you’ll get sucked into an abyss of that depression, anger, resentment, confusion, and heartache from whence they came.

One of which you’ll never escape.

Do not remember the former things,
Nor consider the things of old.
Behold, I will do a new thing,
Now it shall spring forth;
Shall you not know it?
I will even make a road in the wilderness
And rivers in the desert.

Isaiah 43:18-19

Read That, Again. Now, Choose.

/ The WheatandTares / 4 Comments

This statement is the proof between maturity and immaturity.

It is the difference in the choice driven life and victim driven life.

It is the challenge of every human being alive.

You can either grow through your pain or allow it to consume you.

You can either choose to let it change you for good or for evil.

You can either live with determination or excuses.

It is up to you, and what you choose, what you allow will determine not only your outcome.

It will very likely determine the outcome for your children and/or those around you.

So, what will you choose?

How will you grow?

And who will reap the benefits ..or consequences?

Choose wisely, please.

And if it seems evil to you to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.

Joshua 24:15

Peace is a Key

/ The WheatandTares / 6 Comments

What positive emotion do you feel most often?

As I noted in another blog, peace is the one thing I carry with me at all times, and it is the positive emotion I try to have and to feel most often.

Peace is a key to unlock so many more positive emotions.

I’m usually not a real dramatic person, not a person of high emotion; so, this emotion might seem to come to me more easily than some. However, I work on it as well.

If you’re a person of lots of drama or a person of high emotion, it might take a little more work to get to a peaceful state, but it really boils down to your thought life.

What you think, you become.

If you dwell on fear, you’re gonna deal with lots of anxiety and fear.

If you dwell on sadness, you’re going to be sad and even depressed.

If you dwell on anger, you’re going to live in a state of anger and rage.

If you dwell on doubt and never ending questions, you’re going to be consumed in a cloud of confusion.

You get my point.

Negative thoughts breed negativity.

Positive thoughts breed positivity.

The beautiful thing is we get to CHOOSE what we think about.

Some would say, But thoughts just pop into my head. Yes. You are truthful in that.

However, it’s the thoughts you choose to keep that produce the outcome.

The thoughts you choose to nurture, strengthen and continually go back to, these are what you become.

So, I ask you: What positive emotion do you feel most often?

And maybe a better question would be:

What positive emotion do you choose to feel most often?

For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.

Proverbs 23:7

You will keep him in perfect peace,
Whose mind is stayed on You,
Because he trusts in You.

Isaiah 26:3