friendship

If we were having coffee 5/28/16…

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

  If we were having coffee, I’d ask you to join me in the living room, because we’re having our deck redone, and there’s wood and nails everywhere. I’d open the blinds and let us look out into the backyard full green leaves and trees with the evening sun beaming gently through the branches. It’s been a gorgeous day today.

How has your week been? Has it been hot your way? If you got kids at home, are they out for the summer? What are your summer plans? Are you writing anything new? Does summer inspire you or kind of wear you out?  …

Honestly, I spent the first several days of this week longing for a repeat of our week in Daytona last week. It’s been a week full of getting ready for the last day of school, looking toward summer and thinking about summer vacation. It’s been a little busy, but it’s been a good week. 

Something fun happened for our oldest on Friday. He went “on the road” with a local Christian rapper. That was really neat, and he had a lot of fun. He had to work his tail off, but it was great experience for him. That is the dream he has; so, it really gave him an idea of what it might be like one day. He’s looking forward to the next time he hets to go. 

That same day, our youngest was invited to someone’s house; so, we, in turn, got a free, kid-less Friday. That was fun. We went on a spontaneous little date. I love spending time with my man! 

Well, I guess, we’ll call it a wrap tonight. I’ve got loads of laundry to get done, and I know you don’t care to see all that. I hope you have an awesome week ahead! Try to stay cool, and I look forward to catching up again next week! 😊

Thank, Diana at Parttimemonster.com for hosting this wonderful #coffeeshare. It’s always a delight. 

If We Were Having Coffee…

/ The WheatandTares / 20 Comments

If we were having coffee today, I might have you walk past a few suitcases and ask you to definitely not look at the laundry room, because we just got back from a week away. I’ll tell you more about that in just a minute. Let’s get a cup of warm brew and settle back here on the deck…

How was your week? I might even ask, How has the last few weeks been for you? I’ve missed a few coffee chats these last few weekends; so, we have a little catching up to do. Have you been well? Anything exciting happen? Did you have a good Mother’s Day for yourself or with your mom or your daughter? …

Things have gone well here. Mother’s Day was sweet; my guys always treat me so nice. I think maybe one of the most special moments of the weekend was that morning… I was already in a bit of a frenzy, because I had woken up an hour late. Yet, I was almost running on time. Haha. I had called out to my boys that we’d leave in about 5 mins., only to realize I hadn’t put on a stitch of makeup! 😜 So, I proceeded, finished up, and headed downstairs to leave. Our oldest said, “Five minutes, huh?” (Always the “smart” one. 😂 Lol) I told him it would’ve been had I not had to apply makeup. A few minutes later, as we were walking to the truck, he said, “Ya know mom, you didn’t have to worry about the makeup…You don’t need it…You’re beautiful without it.” Oh my! Be still my beating heart!! That boy brought me to tears…and I just about had to reapply the makeup again! 😂 Love him so much! 💕 We had family over later to grill out, and it was just a GREAT day.

The next week was pretty uneventful, I suppose, but we did get several pieces of needed furniture; so, that was fun. However, this week has been very eventful and simply wonderful! My husband and I celebrated 20 years being married, and someone blessed us with a week’s stay in Daytona Beach, Fl. The weather this week has been pretty stormy, but the moods of the ocean and clouds captured on film is totally worth it! Here, let me show you some of the pics…

A brewing storm

We had an absolute blast! It was just he and I, and we sure did miss the boys, but we made some wonderful memories together. We stayed in a great resort, right on the beach. Our room was really nice, and it had an extra large balcony that reached out toward the pool area. It was one of only two balconies like it; so, it kind of made you feel like you had an extra special room. We spent the week together exploring restaurants, walking the beach, “hiking” to the top of the lighthouse, watching the sunrises and trying to catch the sunsets when they availed themselves.

Sunrise on our anniversary

 

Our anniversary day couldn’t have been better. We woke to an absolutely gorgeous day! The sunrise was stunning. We walked downtown through several of the vintage antique shops then went to eat at a restaurant called Aunt Catfish’s. Talk about good food! I’ll be sharing about it on a Tuesday’s Treat real soon.

We were so tired after lunch, we went back to the room for a little nap. When we got up, we got all dressed up for an early dinner at Stonewood Grill in Ormond Beach. Oh. My. Word. It was a great meal! (Again, I’ll share soon on Tuesdays Treats…we’ve eaten great all week!) We then went back, changed into comfortable clothes, and drove to Ponce Inlet to walk the beach and the jetty.


It was absolutely awesome. Joey stopped, told me how much he loved me and how thankful he was to have married me 20 years ago and kissed me. The whole day was so overwhelmingly awesome, I cried! Yeah, I know, that’s sappy right there, but I did! I am just so thankful for him, our life, this trip, all of it. I have been so blessed. 💗

The moon “rise” after a storm

 

Ok, well, I could probably go on an on, but I’m sure you probably have enough to do without sitting here listening to me jabber. It’s been so fun having coffee with you. I always love our little chats, and I look forward to ‘seeing’ you again soon. Here, I’ll take your coffee cup and walk you to the door…I hope you have a blessed week ahead! 😊

*Thanks to Diana over at Parttimemonster.com for hosting this coffee share linkup. 😉

In Hot Pursuit

/ The WheatandTares / 6 Comments

 “He who does not love does not know God, for God is love.” 1 John 4:8
Did you know Gid pursues us with His love? He surrounds us with beauty everyday so that we might think of Him. He sends good things our way so that we might remember Him. Even in trials and tribulations, even in the smallest things, people have testified time and again of the goodness of the Lord. We just have to open our eyes to see it. 

Why does He do this? He pursues us with His love, because He longs for us to be with Him. He longs to walk with us, to talk with us, to have a friendship, a deep relationship with us. He longs to be reunited with us. 

How much do we pursue Him in this way? Do we only think about Him when it comes church time and prayer time over the meal? Do we only think of Him when we are in trouble or in distress, because, after all, He is a God of wisdom and a God of answers. He’s a God of refuge and help. 

He pursues us, because He wants our hearts as well as our hands. He can catch our hands easily. It’s easy to catch your child’s hand when they’re young, when they need help after a tumble, or when you need to stop them from running in the street. However, it’s harder to catch the hand of your teen when they desperately long for independence and have so many new avenues to find that freedom. It’s even harder to win the heart of your grown child if you didn’t quite master the task in their younger years. 

Too often, I believe we have this same tendency toward our Heavenly Father. When we first get saved, He is all we think about, all we talk about. We pursue a relationship with Him. Yet, as life moves forward, the responsibilities pull on us, and the priorities of life knock down our door, we set Him aside for brighter, easier days. We forget about that relationship we once had when we communed daily with Him. We wait till we are in distress to call on His name. 
But oh, the sweetness of walking with Him day by day. Oh the joy we miss when He’s put aside. 

He’s still there where you left Him. Seek Him out today. You will find Him. He promised when you seek Him with all your heart, you will find Him. 

Scarred

/ The WheatandTares / 1 Comment

SCARRED
Originally posted: OCTOBER 11, 2014

img_8148

I stand here in shock, not knowing what to do;

I cannot believe the feelings I’ve caught here from you.

Memories from the past overwhelm my weary mind,

But now, in chains, these memories they do bind.

My hands to you, we were reaching for the stars.

My dreams, our friendship, now you have scarred.

The distance you’ve placed, this I do not understand.

Between us, our sisterhood, is it now banned?

The anger, the jealousy, I pray it does not last.

So many questions I’m left with, only not to ask.

This brokenness and pain, I wish I did not feel.

They all say it takes way too much time to heal.

As I stand here with this bleeding heart,

I pray that one day we have a brand new start.

God can cleanse, forgive and always can mend,

But it takes you and me with this friendship to tend.

Penned – MG – 7/7/99

Daily Prompt: Scar
Scars

If We Were Having Coffee

/ The WheatandTares / 9 Comments

If we were having coffee, I’d invite you to have a seat on the couch, cuz it’s been raining a bit this evening and now, there is a downpour. Would you like coffee or tea or maybe a bit of hot cocoa?

Now, that you have your yummy cup of goodness, let’s sit and chat for a bit… I have some fun news this week…

Yesterday, my husband and I were treated to a “Night on the Town”in downtown Atlanta. Joey’s mom came to keep the boys, and we were picked up by a limo at 4:00.

We proceeded to Atlanta to eat At Fogo De Chao, a Brazillian Steakhouse. Oh. My. Goodness. You can really hurt yourself when eating there! They have an enormous salad bar, appropriately called, The Market Table, and then, when you’re ready, the waiters start bringing out the meats! You have a little coaster, which is red on one side and green on the other, and you use this to let the waiters know if/when you want more. The room seems almost to “move” as each waiter goes from table to table with a skewer stacked high of individual types of meat, such as, top sirloin, bottom sirloin, house sirloin, filet of lamb, ribs, pork loin, etc. You can choose what you like, and you can have as much as you’d like.

The food is absolutely fantastic, and because it’s simply slices of meat that each waiter gives you, it’s pretty easy to not realize how much you’ve really eaten until you are about to bust!
We left from there and checked in at The Westin. We were supposed to have dessert at the Sun Dial Restaurant, which is on the 72 floor, but we were so full, we didn’t dare. After we had recouperated a little, we decided to go up to the restaurant and see the view. They have a Gallery, just above the restaurant, where you can walk all around and every view is overlooking the city of Atlanta. It was absolutely beautiful! 

We left to come home today, and I was glad, as I’m not a big city girl, but we definitely had a blast for a treated ‘evening in the town!’😊

So, how was YOUR week? Anything exciting or interesting happen in your life? Please, tell!

It’s been lovely sharing this time with you, but now, it’s getting late, and our littlest one has climbed up beside me and fallen asleep; so, I suppose I will have to say so long until next week! 😉 Try to stay dry out there, and I do hope you have a wonderful week!

Ps. Don’t forget to check out some of the other great coffee chats at the Coffee Share hosted by our gracious host Diana at PartTimeMonster.

 

Are You A True Friend?

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

A friend is someone with whom you enjoy spending time. You hang out doing things together or simply relaxing after a hard week. You laugh together, talk about good turns and great memories, and maybe even dream about the days to come.

A good friend is someone with you share your joys, your troubles and your fears. You cry on her shoulder and wipe her tears that flow with yours. You share the exciting news of good things. You tell of the concerns growing and the ones that have dissipated.

A best friend is one who is with you, and who wants to stay, in the darkest times. She draws from your strength when she is weak and encourages you when yours is failing. She believes in who you are, recognizes who you’ve been, and loves you for who you are becoming.

A true friend is one who does all that has been mentioned, and He is the one who has your back when someone comes against you. He speaks up for you when you’re not able. He goes into the fight with you, and his wounds are as deep as yours and sometimes more. He protects you when you can’t protect yourself.

God is the absolute best friend we could ever have. He is all of these things and more. Often, I struggle with the thought of being a “friend” of God, because I feel I fail Him in so many ways. I wonder how in the world can I live up to being a friend like He is to me, and then, my thoughts are turned toward my own friendships.

There are times when I might be stronger in a relationship than the other person; yet, there are other items, when I lean so heavily in my friend, I wonder how she’s still standing. At that moment, I realize, if this is true on my human relationships, how much more can it be true with a Holy and Perfect God?

He loves us so much, and He longs for a relationship with us. He doesn’t demand it to be perfect. He knows we are not capable of perfection. Yet, He takes us as we are. He loves us where we are, and challenges us to be more. He gives and blesses, refines and transforms, and enables us to be a friend to Him.

I am so humbled. I am so thankful that He draws me and asks me to be a friend even with all my imperfections, failings and need for change. It makes me love Him even more. 💗

Are you a true friend? Is He yours?

If We Were Having Coffee

/ The WheatandTares / 9 Comments


If we were having coffee, you’d know it was hot today, and tonight it’s still a bit warm outside; however, since my husband keeps the temps at 69-70 degrees in here, and I’m the cold-natured one, I’m wearing a sweater right now. Let’s move to the back deck where we can chat and listen to the birds chirp and the neighbor mowing his grass.

Would you like coffee, tea or hot chocolate? I have a little “coffee bar” here in the house; so, you can take your pick. Today, I think I’d prefer to have a little lemon and honey with a pinch of Cheyenne pepper, as I’m trying to kick this sinus junk I’ve had this week. Can I offer you cream and sugar with your coffee or tea, or would you like a little hot chocolate with marshmallows or peppermints?

Ok, let’s kick back in these lounge chairs on the deck. Aren’t the trees just stunning out here, and the birds are singing to us while the creek is babbling over the waterfall below. Ahh…this is one of my favorite spots in the world…

 

Yeah, this is REALLY in my backyard!

This is my first weekend share; so, please forgive me if I kind of blunder through it. I’ve been reading them for a few weeks, enjoying finding new blogs and contemplating if I would join. Considering I love coffee, love to read, and love a good conversation, I figured, “Why not?”

Ok, so enough chitter chatter about ‘nothing,’ now onto some interesting things going on this week. My husband, boys and I are trying to decide what to do for the summer. We really want to take a trip out West, but the cost, the time and the drive is making us pause and consider the pros and cons. We thought maybe we’d just buy a camper to make the drive a little easier. We’ve been looking throughout the week. There’s some good deals out there, but do we really want to “take the plunge,” spend that kind of money and try to figure out where to store that thing. We are still contemplating; however, yesterday, after coming in from looking, my husband received an email for an incredible offer to stay at a cabin on the lake in Highlands, NC, for the summer. If you’ve never been to Highlands, it is a town at 4,000 elevation; so, the temperatures in the summer are always like a cool Spring day! We’ve always wanted to stay there for a while. OH, decisions, decisions!

This week was pretty noneventful for me, I suppose. The boys had school. I ran errands and worked a little at the church most days, as well as, helped out at the school…just kind of the “same ol’ same ol’,” I guess…

Oh! I just remembered something. Let me pull out my phone and show you some pictures from Monday, which turned out to be kind of our “Saturday,” as we had things going on this past Friday and Saturday and couldn’t really get away. We went up to Lake Winfield Scott and onto Vogel State Park. It was an absolutely beautiful day, and we had an awesome time! We ate in Dahlonega at Burbon Street Grill; they have some great fried pickles, burgers and shrimp and grits! We, then, hung out around the lakes a bit. Joey and JMan did a little fishing, ,while I sat near by and read my Kindle, and JGrizz went walking around. We did see a snake shimming across the water. Later, JGrizz and JMan played a little putt putt while Joey and I sat by the creek. We finished out the day with a stop by Betty’s Country Store in Helen. We always joke about how you can get a “cookie the size of your head” in there. They are huge! I always get the apple walnut muffin (with a dollup of icing on top) and a cup of coffee. The coffee really isn’t that good, but it cuts the sweetness of the muffin. Once the muffin is gone, you realize the coffee tastes more like tree bark than anything else! haha! Coffee and all, it was a great day.

Also, the boys had a very eventful evening yesterday. Our church is celebrating Pastor Appreciation Day next week; so, in honor of this, their respective pastors took them out yesterday and gave them “a night on the town.” JGrizz was picked up first by his youth pastor and some friends. He had no idea they were coming, and they showed up on the doorstep complete with “mustaches,” a big greeting card, balloons, cameras rolling and Lecrae blaring from the speakers in the Hummer. He was speechless, which is very unlike him! They took him to dinner, gave him a shopping spree and finished the night riding go-carts. He had a blast! To hear the “updates” of what he was saying throughout the evening and to see his smiles and enthusiastic retelling of the night just blessed my heart! He was still talking about it throughout the day today.

JMan was picked up shortly after this, and he knew a little of what was going on, because one of his little friends had let the secret out on Thursday (haha!); however, he was so excited to go shopping and to Skyzone (an indoor trampoline playground) and finish out the evening with dinner at one of his favorite Mexican restaurant. One of his little friends, who went with them, came home to spend the night with him. They were so wound up, they didn’t fall asleep until after midnight, but to see the smiles on their faces and to hear all their excitement over the night, it was all worth it!

Well, tell me all about your week now, please. I’d love to hear…

Well, it’s getting late, and I’ve got to go fix the boys something to eat; so, I guess, we’ll need to continue this coffee share next time. I hope you’ve enjoyed the coffee. I’ve enjoyed spending time with you, and I do hope you feel the same. I look forward to our get together this time next week. 🙂

Linking up with Diana at PartTimeMonster.com and #weekendcoffeeshare.

 

You call me FRIEND??

/ The WheatandTares

“Friendship is born at that moment when one man says to another: “What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . .”” C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

This very statement, I believe, sheds light on the reason it is often so hard to become a friend of God. Sure, we can truly see ourselves as His daughters (or sons, respectively), His children, His servants and even, for those who really struggle with their place in Christ, His little, lowly followers who are just happy that He doesn’t decide to squash them today! However, sometimes, to see ourselves as His friend, it takes much more than just a quaint little understanding of who He is.

Maybe I’m the only one who has struggled with this…

You see, for me, friendships don’t come that easy, not those kind of friendships that really last, those kind of friendships that are more like blood-kinships, family-types. It’s not because I’m not a friendly person; you can ask anyone who knows me, I may be shy, but I can meet and greet with plenty, and it’s not that I don’t want to have friends. I have tons of people who are great acquaintances, wonderful “friends” with whom I converse during the week, say “Hi” to on Sunday and even hang out with from time to time. These are great and wonderful people, people for whom I care deeply and love immensely. These are definitely friends of mine.

However, these aren’t the friendships to which I’m referring. I’m talking about those people for whom you know without a shadow of a doubt that you’d give your life, those to whom you are comfortable sharing the innermost depths of your heart, never afraid of what they might think once you’re finished, those friends who see you at your very worst and your very best and have loved you regardless of what you’ve said or done at both ends of that spectrum. They are people with whom you have a common bond, a covenant and a kinship of spirit which cannot be broken by circumstances, other people or even your own fears and doubts. These are the kind of friends I’m talking about here, and this kind of friendship is very rare.

Many times, when I look at Jesus, I see a King. I see my Heavenly Father. I see the Creator of the Universe. I see a God so holy, so worthy and so glorious that I can’t even fathom why He would look at a lowly creature like me and love me and desire a friendship with me. Often, my mind has a hard time comprehending such majesty, such faithfulness, such love, and such a friendship.

Yet, then, my fourteen year old son walks into the room, and I begin to think of the conversation we had at lunch earlier that day. We enjoyed laughing together, talking about his latest music find and musing about the days to come. I remember how my soul longed for more time with him and how my heart leapt when he asked my help with something I thought maybe he didn’t need.

That’s when this statement by C.S. Lewis comes alive in my spirit, and I see just a glimpse of what my Heavenly Father might be feeling toward me. If I, being just a human, just a creature of such flesh, can long for a friendship with my own growing son, maybe, He, as King but also Father to me, can long for a kindred spirit and deep friendship with me. As I spend more time with Him, the more I get to know Him and the love He has for me, I find myself saying this very thing that C.S. Lewis said, “What! You too? I thought that no one but myself…”

 

A Note of Thanks

/ The WheatandTares
Thanksgivingimage
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: 
If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up…. Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, 12
Yesterday was our Staff Appreciation, and I, personally, just have to give a note of thanks. I think we have the best pastoral staff on the planet! Now, I know. You don’t work with them; so, some of you might like to argue that your personal team is better, or some could argue that they “can’t be the best, because no team can be a ‘dream team’,” and that’s ok; you are entitled to your own opinion. However, from where I stand, we couldn’t ask for better.
First and foremost, they love God with all their hearts. Each one of them, in their own way, portray their love for God in the way they speak, the way they teach or preach, in the way they carry themselves on and off “the stage,” and even in the way they treat each other. They are gracious, honorable, full of integrity, servant-minded, and deep of character. They are never competitive, slanderous or spiteful toward one another. They are always seeking to be better Christians, better husbands or wives and better influences to those around them.  I have worked alongside each of them for the last 3 1/2 years here, as well as, for some of them, much longer, and I am a witness to their depth of Christ-like characters and servant-minded lifestyles. They may not always be what everyone expects them to be, nor do they always react in the most “pristine, perfect, superhuman” fashion that some may believe they should, because they are, after all, still very human.  However, I will say that each of them is the most humble individual I have ever met, and they seek with all their hearts to be closer to God while they serve in the ministry to which He has called them.
There are so many qualities they possess, it would take me all day to list each of them, but I have to say, one of the most valuable characteristics they give to our team (aside from loving God, of course!) is they truly love my husband and our family. This is such an important asset to the unity of this team, and I, as a pastor’s wife, am so appreciative. Honestly, it brings tears to my eyes when I think about the graciousness with which they treat my husband, our boys and me. You just don’t find this with every staff dynamic, and we have not always found this to be 100% true everywhere we have been.
Let me share a little of what I mean…
Sometimes, I watch their eyes as my husband challenges them with a new idea, or maybe even a needed rebuke, during a staff meeting. I hear their words of comradery and encouragement to our oldest as he walks into one of their offices and their tone of warmth and acceptance to our youngest, even when they might have better things to be getting accomplished. I see when they go the extra mile to make an adjustment that their pastor has suggested, even when they might not yet completely understand or be incredibly enthused about.  I have even caught a glimpse of their sincerity when they have encountered someone with ill intentions toward me, my husband or our family, as they speak words of admonishment and confrontation to that individual.  These are just a few of the acts of kindness which each of them shows to my family day in and day out, and these are the things which make me love them like family.
Rest assured, these members of our pastoral staff whom we celebrated yesterday are not simply employees of our church nor are they just plain co-workers who ‘pitch in to get a job done.’  They are each a part of, what I choose to call, a great “dream team” helping my husband to be a better pastor, and our church to be a better Body of Christ for the betterment of God’s Kingdom. They and their spouses are a true blessing to us, and I am thankful to have them and to consider them friends, as well as, staff members. These words don’t seem quite adequate today, but I’d like to say, “THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. I love you guys!” ❤
*Note: I do not own, nor do I possess, this picture. Found it simply through Google and sharefaith.com.*

Assuming

/ The WheatandTares

Expectations. 

Assumptions. 

We all have them. We all give them. Yet, sometimes, I think we have too many, and we assert them too quickly…let’s be real for a minute…I know I do, at times…and I’m working on that.

We can’t assume we know the person nor from whence they come lest the road alongside them we travel. This can, especially, happen in the blogging world, can’t it? Let me give you an example of what I’m talking about…

I was reading a blog entry on day, and this young woman had written about the man she was missing. “…can’t breathe. Can’t sleep….sad…he’s been gone two years…” The impression was, for me, she was missing him from death. I commented to her of prayers for her loss, praying she would find comfort and grace. Then, as I read other comments, and her response, I come to realize the guy just keeps coming back and leaving. Ok, so, that was a little annoying! (Just being honest here) At first, I felt bad for her, as she grieved; however, it seemed to, now, be a pattern which she was allowing. That isn’t true grief; that’s being used and making room for it. 
Another blog entry from someone else showed pictures of beauty, words of joy. It was inspiring, encouraging. After I sent a comment, the reply I received proved she was heartbroken and desperate.
We truly can never judge a book by its cover. We can never judge a life by its appearance and, sometimes, not even by their spoken words. There are so many hurting, dying people in this world, and they will simply paint a face of happiness to shield them from further pain. They will simply withdraw; so, no one realizes the depression…because, after all, the outside world never really understands that emotion much anyway. If you don’t believe me, just open the paper and read of the heartbreaking suicides where the friends state they had no clue the person was unstable, because they simply did their job and went home. 

We can only truly know a person’s heart when we walk hand in hand, when we gently ask and are allowed inside the gates of a guarded soul, when they allow us to see their vulnerability and their truth. Sometimes, this can come simply by asking. There are those who are just waiting for someone to show they care. There are others with whom it will take days, months or even years to crack the solid built encasing of their heart, because they have fortified it for years. 

We have to determine how much we truly care and how much time we are willing to give in each relationship. Sometimes, we are too busy to give the adequate care, and so, we simply assume a certain thing, and never try to understand. Other times, we don’t have the right tools to do the hard work of listening and learning, because, after all, that’s not our personality, not our gifting, or even, not our calling. Often, it may be that the other person doesn’t have the ability to give, because so much has been taken from them. The stories and scenarios are endless. It’s so hard to know. 

Yet, for those whom we truly love, for those with whom we find our worlds colliding, we must be able to give the time and attention to break down the expectations and put away the assumptions so that true friendships and deep relationships will last. We may not understand, but the longer we walk the road together, we can learn together. We begin to see “by and by.”