Principles to live by… well, that can be a long list, I guess. But to sum it all up, I suppose the principle that all the rest would fall under would be a principle of love. Yet, if I start describing this in detail, it might look a little different than the societal demand for love these days.
In our current culture, there seems to be a demand to show love by accepting a certain opinion as truth. Or the demand might be that if I disagree with you, then, I’m not showing love but hatred.
Or if I’m not giving you what you want, then I’m not showing love. Or maybe if I’m not giving up something I want, or maybe I’m not suffering in a certain way, then I’m not showing the kind of love I’m supposed to be showing.
Pure, unadulterated love is sacrificial, gracious, and compassionate; yet, it is also full of truth, strength and courage.
True, unblemished love is is not one of these without the other. It is both.
If a parent loves his or her child but allows that child to run in the street to play while the truck is barreling down the path, is that really love?
If a spouse declares his love yet leaves and showers everyone else with his affections because he wants more, is that really love?
If a friend promises to share love and friendship yet breaks every confidence because she wants her liberty to share, is that really love?
If a child proclaims his love to his parents yet steals and destroys because he wants his freedom to live as he pleases, is that really love?
True love will rejoice in the truth, will bear all things, will believe all things, will hope all things, and will endure all things. Love never fails.
And love is impossible without abiding in the Only One who gave true love.
So, what principles define how I live? I guess I could begin with 1 Corinthians 13. I certainly don’t live it perfectly, but I strive toward it daily, only by seeking Him first.
Because He loved me first, now only can I begin to truly love.
Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing. Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. … And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
Beauty really does come in all kinds of shapes and sizes. It all depends on your perspective and angel.
Viewing a brilliant mountain sunset can be all about the incline or all about the glowing orb in the sky. It can be all about the painted sky.
Or it can be about the tiny patch of flowers at your feet that will be trampled if you take another step.
Viewing an enormous crisis can be all about the chaos of sights and sounds or about the multiple dilemmas that have just been added. It can be all about the loss of time, money and energy.
Or it can be about the tiny hand grasping yours that is desperate for reassurance and comfort.
It all depends upon your vantage point.
So, what do you see?
Where is your focus?
Beauty is all around you if you can only open your eyes to see.
For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal.
2 Corinthians 4:17-18
My eyes will watch over them for their good, and I will bring them back to this land. I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the LORD. They will be my people, and I will be their God, for they will return to me with all their heart.
What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?
The best piece of advice would actually be two statements given by different people, but the statements work together:
It takes 1,000 tiny miracles to make a marriage work.
Marriage will only last best when Christ is at the center.
These might sound a bit cliche, and if you don’t have a relationship with Christ; then, it might not even make sense to you. Or if you’ve “been a Christian but everything went wrong in my marriage/in life,” then, it might be a difficult concept for you to accept.
Let me say this loud and clear and long:
Just because the statement did not/does not ring true in your own life, does not make the statement untrue.
That’s why these two statements work so well together. It truly takes a 1,000 tiny miracles to get the right two people together, at the right time, in the right location, under the right circumstances, and in the right context, in the right season for each.
Much more is it tiny miracles that keep those two love birds together over time. After all, he is marrying a woman. And she is marrying a man. Imagine that. Lol. They think differently, act differently, speak differently, react differently, even feel differently. How in the world can that work?
And that’s where God comes in. He is the Creator of our very lives. He designed every part of us and breathed breath into our lungs. How could He not be the miracles working within our lives? But there’s one caveat. He allows us to have the freewill of choice.
You heard me right. He’s the Almighty, great Creator of heaven and earth and all that we see. He is the Master Designer of all creation and of the intricate, complex beings called humans. He is the Alpha Omega, the Beginning and the End, meaning He can create and finish life and everything in it and around it.
Yet, He in His ultimate design, He gives us the ability to choose. We can choose Him or not. We can choose love or hate. We can choose life or death. We get the beautiful freedom of choice.
And what we do with that choice will determine the beautiful finality of those 1,000 tiny miracles that it takes to make a marriage work. What we do in choosing determines where we end up in life and who we end up with. What we do with the choices determines how we think, how we speak, how we act, interact and react, and it determines how we live our lives.
Every. Single. Day.
Every. Single. Minute of that Day.
Every. Single. Second of that Minute of that Day.
These choices don’t automatically make us somehow perfect. They don’t make us sinless. But if we’re daily choosing Christ and the things of Him, it will make us seek perfection, and it will make us sin less. And if two people are seeking, choosing, sacrificing and loving in these ways, it surely helps to support and strengthen a healthy union.
So, what will you choose?
Or better yet, WHO will you choose?
And if it seems evil to you to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
Honestly, I think any life would be dull and lifeless without music. There’s a quote that says, “Music is the words of the soul.” And I believe it’s true.
I’m not just referring to music with instruments, vocals and different genres, but I’m talking about any music. There’s a melody in the trees as the wind rustles the leaves. There’s a lullaby in the setting sun basking upon the mountains. There’s a cadence in the insects that hum and the birds that sing. There’s a crescendo in the waves crashing upon the rocks and shoreline.
In all actuality, there’s probably more music to be found in the nature around us, or in the children’s laughter that rises above the chaos, or the babies cries that surround a mother’s comforting coos than there is in the simple clanging of cymbals and piano keys.
This music brings peace to the soul and laughter to the lips. It brings strength to the mind and healing to the whole being.
So, where my life be without music: lost. Totally and utterly lost without hope. And I am eternally grateful for great melodies, regardless, of where they come from.
What personality trait in people raises a red flag with you?
Rudeness is a personality trait that raises a red flag for me almost immediately. You can be aggravated and not rude. You can be inconvenienced and not rude. You can even be mad and ticked off and still not rude.
Being rude is simply disrespect and apathy flowing out of your mouth and attitude toward someone else. Being rude is a lack of caring who’s around you or how you might be perceived.
Now, look. I’m not setting myself on a high horse and pretending I’ve never been rude. And it’s also not a “make it or break it” attitude for our relationship. We can all have bad days, and we can all make mistakes.
But if you walk around in life believing it’s your prerogative to be rude anytime you like and to anyone whom you dare, then, we’re going to have a problem.
If you believe it’s your God-given right to be rude to the elderly or to children, that’s when you and I aren’t going to get along.
And if you sincerely feel you’ve earned the privilege to be rude simply because you’re too young to know better or too old to care, then, we probably just can’t be friends.
And if you carry on that way long enough in my presence, I’ll even say something to you, retaliate with a bit of rudeness myself, or simply walk away and leave you to your fate.
Rudeness is never a right of passage nor an achievement of greatness.
It is just what it is: RUDE!
And just in case you’re wondering, speaking truth is not being rude, but there are also plenty of opportunities to speak truth firmly and strongly without being rude.
It actually takes more courage to be right and truthful andnot be rude.
And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise.
It’s almost funny, that the daily prompt today is asking if you’re holding a grudge, and my blog post earlier today was about forgiveness.
As they say, maybe great minds do think alike. Lol.
Do I hold a grudge? No. I’d have to say not because I’ve learned forgiveness is more important and more freeing than holding grudges that I could rightfully hold.
Yet, for some whose relationship has been effected by my distance and even my walking away, their narrative could be different. But sometimes, toxicity must be avoided at all costs. And that’s where the judgement begins.
But to hold a grudge means your intent will eventually be to bring harm. Holding a grudge has the intent of revenge. Holding a grudge has the motives of destruction.
Holding a grudge is rooted in the foundation of unforgiveness. Holding a grudge brings resentment and bitterness. Holding a grudge actually brings more harm to you than it does to those against whom the grudge is held.
That grudge will create a prison in which you’ll live if you’ll let it. That grudge will be the hot iron that you think you’re grasping in your hand, yet the longer you hold it, the more it burns your flesh and all those closest to you.
But if you’ll release that grudge, it’s like releasing the hot iron to go back into the fire from whence it came. And the release brings you more freedom than you could ever imagine.
Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Colossians 3:13
Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice.
Dealing with trauma can be excruciating. And just as a wounded animal wants to lash out and wound anyone who would try to help, we as humans will also have a tendency to lash out and bring harm when we are hurting.
We will rear back and punch an honest bystander simply because she leans in to take a second look. We will react with violent anger because he offers a gentle hand. We will claw and bite when they surround and hover, only hoping to give a comforting word or a compassionate nod.
The pain we feel can be so deep and seem so lasting that it actually feels unfair to see a world who is unaffected by it.
The agony can be so debilitating that we feel justified in our knee-jerk reactions and spiteful words because after all, they can’t possibly understand all that we’ve endured.
But what does wounding another accomplish? It doesn’t remove the gash. It certainly never heals the scar. It only leaves those in our wake with their own needed recovery.
And the enemy of our soul celebrates the victory of our further demise. The demons that watched our first injury shout with glee as they observe our continual upheaval and destruction of another.
This is his goal. This is his ultimate objective.
Bring annihilation to all, not just one.
And bring it through the hands of the tortured who should rather be seeking to pour the healing balm.
So, recognize his tactics.
Become keenly aware of his ploys.
And vehemently reject his satisfaction.
Through the bleeding, learn to praise the One who gave you breath.
Through the brokenness, seek to pour the oil of mending on those who are the weakest.
Through the injustice, desire to be the wounded healer embracing instead of victimizing.
Work through the muck and mire to find His calm.
Extend your heart with all it’s shattered dreams to find His love.
And as you do, stretch yourself to find someone deeper in the pit than you have fallen and struggle to lift them up and pull them out.
When you do, you’ll find yourself conquering the enemy with your peace.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer. Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation.
My journey didn’t stop with mere time travel or writing; it led me to become one of the most sought-after empaths, a soulful psychic who reads the hidden depths of the human spirit. I’ve been blessed—or perhaps burdened—with an ability that allows me to feel the emotions of people from every corner of time.
I am a licensed psychologist based in Greece. My love for housekeeping has inspired me to create this blog about home management and family relationships. I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing!
Dedicated to movie nerdom, nostalgia, and soul invigoration. In the late 90s, I worked at Blockbuster Video where they let me take home two free movies a day. I caught up on the classics and reviewed theatrical releases for Denver 'burbs newspapers and magazines. Today, while raising two young, beautiful daughters with my amazing wife, I look forward to anything rated R and not Bluey. Comments and dialogue encouraged!
