Goodbyes to those who have caused pain can be all together freeing; yet, the grief will come in waves as the broken covenant becomes a reality.
It can be all together overwhelming.
Just because the decision to leave is right doesn’t mean it will be full of joy and laughter.
Just because the need to walk away is necessary doesn’t mean the path is smooth and easy.
It can be the hardest season of life.
And the loneliest.
Yet, never doubt the resolution to remove toxicity and never return to it simply because of the sharp agony of separation.
Cry the tears that must be shed.
Weep and wail.
Rant and rage.
Then, take a deep breath and exhale.
And know that through the grief, an inner strength will grow which will extend beyond the pain.
But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good,traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!
Sometimes, healing comes instantly, but more often than not, it’s a long and tedious process.
Just as it takes a broken limb weeks, even months to mend, the heart needs so much more.
We are emotional beings. We are thought-filled humans, and wounds are like a heavy broomstick lying atop a tangled web of cords.
You’re not going to move that stick without disturbing the cords. You can’t just grab it, swoop it up, and call it a day.
You’re gonna have to move slow.
You’re gonna have to breathe deep and exhale at a snail’s pace.
You’ve got to ensure the healing is there.
And sometimes, a tiny gesture, a simple word, a small memory can come crashing in to slam that stick back onto the pile and even twist it a good bit!
Slow down, one more time.
Breathe in deep, one more time.
Exhale slowly, one more time.
Now, go work on picking up that stick again, one more time.
You can do this hard.
It might be messy, excruciating and long, but I promise you:
The healing is worth it.
Then He came to Bethsaida; and they brought a blind man to Him, and begged Him to touch him. So He took the blind man by the hand and led him out of the town. And when He had spit on his eyes and put His hands on him, He asked him if he saw anything. And he looked up and said, “I see men like trees, walking.” Then He put His hands on his eyes again and made him look up. And he was restored and saw everyone clearly.
Grief can be hidden and tucked away so deep, you almost forget it’s there.
Yet, when it peeks back through the shadows, it’s like a scream within that no one else can hear.
But you can sense it, even in the deepest shadows.
You can feel it, even in the stillest night.
You can almost see it, even in the blackest of eves.
And it will return with such fierce vengeance while no one else recognizes it’s deafening sound.
That is grief.
The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart and saves such as have a contrite spirit.
Psalm 34:18
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.
If you’re moving forward, there’s going to be pressing.
If you have no pressure, no pressing points which have become uncomfortable, you’re probably not developing.
Just as a flower has to break through the seed and push up through the ground, when you are going to bring about change, there has to be a breaking, a crushing, and finally, a breakthrough.
So, if life is heating up, and you’re feeling the weight of responsibilities and decision making deepening around you, stand strong and walk proud.
Not in conceit or arrogance. Only in humility and respect can you truly survive.
But if you’ll rise to the occasion, grasp the reigns of opportunity and ride it to probability, you can thrive under the constraints.
You can succeed under the strain.
And when you do, not only will the blooms be beautiful, but the impact on those around will be spectacular, too.
My flesh and my heart fail; But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
Psalm 73:26
We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed— always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body.
For years, I’ve heard of the movie Good Will Hunting. I’ve tried to watch it on air flights every chance I got. But the unedited version just turned me off after the first maybe 5 mins. Forgive me. I’m weird like that, but I just don’t get into a lot of foul language and crude conversations. I’m not a big movie watcher anyway; so, I don’t care to waste my time…
But my husband had first watched it on an edited flight many years ago and had been referencing it for one situation or another all this time. I wanted to watch it so bad, I was almost tempted just to forgo my personal standards and just watch it anyway. Well, he told me the other day he’d had the tv edited version on our recordings for a while now, and he didn’t realize I’d wanted to watch it so bad. Lol.
So, we finally found time to sit down to watch it, and Wow. If you’ve not seen this. You need to. Of course, I would definitely encourage the edited version. Ha.ha. But anyway.
Without being a spoiler, let’s just say this little statement above came alive and well in the middle of the story, and I just balled my eyes out! Geez. I’m so glad I was in the privacy of my own home with only my husband to see me crying like a blubbering idiot and not on a plane where a whole bunch of strangers would wonder what in the world was my problem!
Some days the memories still knock the wind out of me.
And that’s just the honest truth of life, isn’t it?
It doesn’t really matter if it’s past pain, grief, brokenness or shame. When the memories come up, it doesn’t matter how deep you’ve stuffed them down, or how far beneath the surface you think you’ve buried them.
They’re going to slam into your heart like a tsunami.
They’re going to run through your mind like a twister seeking a place to land.
They’re going to roll over your soul like a freight train.
There’s no real stopping them.
You might as well stop the denial. And you might as well not try to run. Cuz they’ll chase you down and beat you, or they’ll just lie in wait for you at your next destination.
Memories don’t go away like a vapor in the wind.
They are like the fragrance on that wind, choosing when to come and when to go.
Claiming no responsibility and receiving no accountability.
Never giving forwarning of their arrival nor a wave to their departure.
They just are and forever will be.
It’s better to embrace, evaluate, excavate and even let them exuberate.
Otherwise, you’ll get sucked into an abyss of that depression, anger, resentment, confusion, and heartache from whence they came.
One of which you’ll never escape.
Do not remember the former things, Nor consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing, Now it shall spring forth; Shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness And rivers in the desert.
My journey didn’t stop with mere time travel or writing; it led me to become one of the most sought-after empaths, a soulful psychic who reads the hidden depths of the human spirit. I’ve been blessed—or perhaps burdened—with an ability that allows me to feel the emotions of people from every corner of time.
I am a licensed psychologist based in Greece. My love for housekeeping has inspired me to create this blog about home management and family relationships. I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing!
Dedicated to movie nerdom, nostalgia, and escape. In the late 90s, I worked at Blockbuster Video where they let me take home two free movies a day. I caught up on the classics and reviewed theatrical releases for Denver 'burbs newspapers and magazines. Today, while raising two young, beautiful daughters with my amazing wife, I look forward to anything rated R and not Bluey. Comments and dialogue encouraged!
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