Do the Hard With Grace

December 10, 2023December 10, 2023 / The WheatandTares

What is something others do that sparks your admiration?

I have a friend whose husband has just had his leg amputated this past week because of diabetic neuropathy. He was cracking pirate jokes the day after, and she was back in church worshipping on Sunday.

I have a friend whose husband travels extensively throughout the year as a lawyer who defends faith rights as she stays home with her littles, and she still offers a friendly hand, makes a phone call to the hurting, reaches out to the lonely.

I have a friend whose husband was shot in the line of duty, and she works hard to raise their fifth child while also sharing with others about her faith and the peace Jesus can bring in spite of pain, and she’s also working vigorously on her own degree in the study of law.

I have a friend whose wife died tragically in a car wreck, and the very week following her funeral, with tears still to shed, he got on a plane to fly to her hometown to preach the gospel and tell people about the Jesus that she desperately loved.

Each of these friends have heart wrenching stories with details that might break the next person. But each them stand in their faith and keep loving, keep reaching, keep grieving, and keep worshipping their Creator. I’ve watched some go through much less and blame God, walk away from Him and even curse Him.

And you might wonder what’s the difference. Or maybe look at them with criticism and scoff at their faith. Or maybe you gaze upon their path and wonder how in the world you could do the same.

But I’ll tell you what I admire most: their admiration of their King and their ability to do the hard with the deepest of grace.

Their adoration inspires me.

Their vigor admonishes me.

Their dedication and determination encourages me.

It’s not your circumstances that make you.

It’s what you do with those circumstances that makes the difference.

Choosing grace over anger creates an atmosphere of strength and fortitude that cannot be easily silenced.

Choosing faith over despair creates a contagious courage that cannot be ignored.

It doesn’t mean pain is not felt, and it doesn’t mean fear is not faced, but it is the warrior within who brings a peace to those following which cannot be shaken by what’s to come and is sought after as if for fine gold.

This is what ignites my admiration.

This is what sparks the flames of my praise.

But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed.
2 Corinthians 4:7-9

And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.
Romans 5:3-5

Take the Challenge: Heal

October 31, 2023October 29, 2023 / The WheatandTares

Healing truly is a choice.

You can choose to remain in that pain, that sorrow, that grief, or you can choose to take those steps out.

Now, don’t scoff. Don’t ridicule. Don’t turn me off.

I know this isn’t an easy read.

You might be screaming I don’t understand.

You may be shouting I don’t see your space.

You might be shrugging I don’t hear you.

You may be screeching I don’t feel your struggle.

But I do understand. I do see. I do hear. I do feel.

Because I am there.

My place may not be yours, but it is mine alone.

And there is a hope for tomorrow, but it is mine to grasp.

Mine alone.

And you have the same. If you will but choose.

Don’t remain a victim of circumstance.

Don’t stay a martyr of the past.

Don’t settle as a casualty of the shattered.

Fight for the new day.

Fight for the brighter future.

Fight for the healing to come.

What you don’t fight for, you don’t deserve, and you can never declare as your own.

Fight for it with every breath.

And win.

Even when you feel you can’t.

Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may obtain it.
1 Corinthians 9:24

Grief … Part 742

October 30, 2023October 29, 2023 / The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

Grief can be hidden and tucked away so deep, you almost forget it’s there.

Yet, when it peeks back through the shadows, it’s like a scream within that no one else can hear.

But you can sense it, even in the deepest shadows.

You can feel it, even in the stillest night.

You can almost see it, even in the blackest of eves.

And it will return with such fierce vengeance while no one else recognizes it’s deafening sound.

That is grief.

The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart and saves such as have a contrite spirit.
Psalm 34:18

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4

Prison of Memories

September 5, 2023September 1, 2023 / The WheatandTares / 5 Comments

For years, I’ve heard of the movie Good Will Hunting. I’ve tried to watch it on air flights every chance I got. But the unedited version just turned me off after the first maybe 5 mins. Forgive me. I’m weird like that, but I just don’t get into a lot of foul language and crude conversations. I’m not a big movie watcher anyway; so, I don’t care to waste my time…

But my husband had first watched it on an edited flight many years ago and had been referencing it for one situation or another all this time. I wanted to watch it so bad, I was almost tempted just to forgo my personal standards and just watch it anyway. Well, he told me the other day he’d had the tv edited version on our recordings for a while now, and he didn’t realize I’d wanted to watch it so bad. Lol.

So, we finally found time to sit down to watch it, and Wow. If you’ve not seen this. You need to. Of course, I would definitely encourage the edited version. Ha.ha. But anyway.

Without being a spoiler, let’s just say this little statement above came alive and well in the middle of the story, and I just balled my eyes out! Geez. I’m so glad I was in the privacy of my own home with only my husband to see me crying like a blubbering idiot and not on a plane where a whole bunch of strangers would wonder what in the world was my problem!

Some days the memories still knock the wind out of me.

And that’s just the honest truth of life, isn’t it?

It doesn’t really matter if it’s past pain, grief, brokenness or shame. When the memories come up, it doesn’t matter how deep you’ve stuffed them down, or how far beneath the surface you think you’ve buried them.

They’re going to slam into your heart like a tsunami.

They’re going to run through your mind like a twister seeking a place to land.

They’re going to roll over your soul like a freight train.

There’s no real stopping them.

You might as well stop the denial. And you might as well not try to run. Cuz they’ll chase you down and beat you, or they’ll just lie in wait for you at your next destination.

Memories don’t go away like a vapor in the wind.

They are like the fragrance on that wind, choosing when to come and when to go.

Claiming no responsibility and receiving no accountability.

Never giving forwarning of their arrival nor a wave to their departure.

They just are and forever will be.

It’s better to embrace, evaluate, excavate and even let them exuberate.

Otherwise, you’ll get sucked into an abyss of that depression, anger, resentment, confusion, and heartache from whence they came.

One of which you’ll never escape.

Do not remember the former things,
Nor consider the things of old.
Behold, I will do a new thing,
Now it shall spring forth;
Shall you not know it?
I will even make a road in the wilderness
And rivers in the desert.
Isaiah 43:18-19

Bring Beauty to the Thorns

August 17, 2023August 15, 2023 / The WheatandTares

This life can be like a cactus many times.

The pain, the hardships, the struggles, they can all feel like piercing thorns that stab and poke into your most vulnerable moments.

The difficulties, the mishaps and failures can become like so many briars and dry patches that never seem to end.

But if I could encourage you today…

If I could give you one thought…

Blossom amongst the thistles.

Flourish amongst the bramble.

Don’t allow your circumstances to steal your beauty.

Don’t allow the heartache and brokenness to squelch your lovely fragrance and striking brilliance.

Bloom until you thrive and show the world there’s still elegance despite afflictions.

The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me,
Because the Lord has anointed Me
To preach good tidings to the poor;
He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives,
And the opening of the prison to those who are bound;
To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord,
And the day of vengeance of our God;
To comfort all who mourn,
To console those who mourn in Zion,
To give them beauty for ashes,
The oil of joy for mourning,
The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they may be called trees of righteousness,
The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified.”
Isaiah 61:1-3

Grief .. Part 563

June 15, 2023September 21, 2023 / The WheatandTares

The journey of grief seems so long, so treacherous, and so methodical.

If you dwell too much on the journey, you’ll wander along the creek side, lost.

Never stopping for a drink.

The water continues to flow along the path, and it is for your refreshing, your renewal.

For the journey is hard, and it’s not meant for eternity.

Stay alert and remain vigilant in the middle of the walk.

Stay revived and maintain the elements to survive.

Grief is like a thief if you’ll allow him to be.

He will steal days, years, even hours and minutes

He will steal joy and peace, prosperity and comfort.

Don’t let him stay too long, or he will even steal your sanity.

You can’t shut him out; for then, he will only come back with gained force.

But don’t open the gate wide to welcome; for he will consume all territory that is lonely.

Fortify the good within and remain watchful.

Maintain the gates with prayer, steadfastness and faith.

Let him walk through, but swing open the back door with a celebration and fanfare.

For he will always peek through the windows and the trellises, but he cannot set up to abide.

For His anger is but for a moment, His favor is for life; Weeping may endure for a night, But joy comes in the morning.
Psalm 30:5

As the deer pants for the water brooks,
So pants my soul for You, O God.
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When shall I come and appear before God? My tears have been my food day and night, while they continually say to me,
“Where is your God?” When I remember these things, I pour out my soul within me.
For I used to go with the multitude;
I went with them to the house of God,
With the voice of joy and praise,
With a multitude that kept a pilgrim feast. Why are you cast down, O my soul?
And why are you disquieted within me?
Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him
For the help of His countenance. O my God, my soul is cast down within me; therefore, I will remember You from the land of the Jordan, and from the heights of Hermon, from the Hill Mizar.
Deep calls unto deep at the noise of Your waterfalls; All Your waves and billows have gone over me. The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime, and in the night His song shall be with me—
A prayer to the God of my life. I will say to God my Rock, “Why have You forgotten me?
Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?”
As with a breaking of my bones,
My enemies reproach me,
While they say to me all day long,
“Where is your God?” Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me?
Hope in God;
For I shall yet praise Him,
The help of my countenance and my God.
Psalm 42

Now the Lord said to Samuel, “How long will you mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? Fill your horn with oil, and go; I am sending you to Jesse the Bethlehemite. For I have provided Myself a king among his sons.”
1 Samuel 16:1

Grief … Part 495

June 14, 2023September 21, 2023 / The WheatandTares

Grief can be like a bull in the field.

He looks all nice and cozy, chewing his cud, minding his own business.

But don’t get too close, or you’ll feel his horns.

That bull goes about his day, grazing, watching, or just lazing around.

But you get into his sight, and he’s liable to gorge you.

That bull has a family, or maybe he’s a loner.

Leave him alone.

Don’t prod him.

Don’t prick him.

And certainly, don’t pet him.

He’s there to do his thing, and he will come and go as he pleases.

Just keep your eyes on him.

Never let him out of your peripheral view.

For that is when he will sneak up for the kill.

And you’ll be fortunate to survive the pounding.

Let him roam.

And keep your vision clear.

Learn from every encounter but try not to remain.

He will move on down the pasture when it’s time; although, he will always be there.

Just let him roam further and further.

But never let him out of your sight.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer. Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation. And our hope for you is steadfast, because we know that as you are partakers of the sufferings, so also you will partake of the consolation.
2 Corinthians 3-7

And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure.
2 Corinthians 12:7

Grief … Part 294

June 13, 2023June 13, 2023 / The WheatandTares

It seems funny to give a title to grief as if I am numbering sheets of paper, but yet, how else do you list it?

Grief is evasive and yet, it is so invasive.

Grief is like a cool, summer rain, and yet, it’s like a torrential tsunami that barrels in with no warning.

Grief is both bittersweet and just plain sour.

And when grief comes by new forms and methods consistently over the years, it gets hard to dissect the good in the pain.

Just hold on.

And pray.

A lot.

We were not made for this world.

We were not made for this grief, and that’s why it’s so foreign. That’s why it’s so hard.

We were made for an eternal world, and we will be there before we know it.

He’s coming back soon.

Just hold on and be ready.

And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
2 Corinthians 12:9

For His anger is but for a moment, His favor is for life; Weeping may endure for a night, But joy comes in the morning.
Psalm 30:5

Keep Hoppin’ Those Boulders

May 30, 2023May 29, 2023 / The WheatandTares

Grief is like the boulder hopping moments of life.

To succeed in getting to the sunset, you’ve got to keep moving.

To achieve the goal of the setting horizon, you’ve got to keep taking the jump.

To get past the hardest points, one foot must stay in front of the other.

Even if you slip. Even if you stumble.

Keep going forward. Keep going beyond.

You’ll get there.

Eventually.

And you’ll be so glad you did.

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in his way.
Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down; for the Lord upholds him with His hand.
Psalm 37:23-24