Do You Have Presents or Presence?

December 28, 2016January 4, 2017 / The WheatandTares / 1 Comment

Taking time out with family and friends does a body good…and the mind and the soul… If you’re the type who has to work, work, work, and you never take time out to relax, to spend time with family and friends, and just to simply take time out to think, you are really robbing yourself and the ones who love you. When you consume your time with “presents” (of wealth, fame and power) with the lack of presence (of people), you will find your life full of emptiness.

It’s so sad to me to watch people who filled their life with agendas and ambitions, and then, when they grow older and aren’t in the work force anymore and aren’t able to accomplish what they once did, they find themselves sitting alone in a room wondering when someone will come to visit. You can simply walk through the assisted living facilities and nursing homes and see countless men and women waiting alone.

The presence of relationships is so important in this life. You don’t have to have a ton, but the ones you have must be deep. They have to be meaningful. They have to be full of love and life. When you have these, you have something to hold on to when the days grow dark and the nights grow lonely.

As this new year approaches, ask yourself, are you ambitious about the presents 🎁 or are you ambitious about the presence (of relationships)? Let’s make this new year meaningful and full of life…

Candy, Anyone?

November 23, 2016November 22, 2016 / The WheatandTares

Be soft … not fluffy … not squishy … not not brittle … not chewy … and not hard.

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Cotton candy is fluffy. It really has no substance, no depth, no strength of taste. It’s just super sweet and evaporates rather quickly. Marshmallows are squishy. They are great in hot chocolate or melted in s’mores, but they are so squishy and weak on flavor, it’s hard to eat more than one or two.

Now, peanut brittle can be rather tasty, but it’s so brittle (pun intended), breakable and cracks so easily, it can leave behind an incredible mess. On the other hand, caramel can be rather chewy and filling, except it’s so sticky, if you’re not careful, it might just remove a filling! Once it’s stuck to something, it can be very hard to remove.

Hard candies can be tasty, yet they can be so unbendable, unyielding that they can damage your teeth, and once hard candy is broken, the edges can be sharp and pointed, having dangerous edges, almost like glass. Some even like licorice, but it seems a little lacking in flavor and is so leathery and tough, there’s not much point in pondering long with it.

However, chocolate seems to be a universal delight. Some of the most expensive “candies” are listed as chocolate. Chocolate is smooth, soft, and pliable. It is known to be the “candy” that brings about good feelings and will uplift a mood.

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Chocolate can be both diverse and traditional. It is incredibly tasty and can have an endless number of things added to it to even enhance its flavor. Chocolate can be thick and powerful, or it can be creamy and comforting. It can be consumed in large quantities or tiny little bites, either way, the feelings of warmth and happiness remains the same. Chocolate has been said to be a taste that can touch the very soul of a person. Simply put, chocolate is very hard for most to live without.

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Have you ever looked at a piece of candy and compared yourself? If you were to choose a piece of candy from this list, which might you choose? If you had to compare one of these to your own personality, your attitude and your life story, which might it be?

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Let us always seek to be soft in words rather than hard, smooth in action rather rough and leatherlike. May our lives be known as smooth and delightful, comforting and strong, making a powerful impact wherever we go, such an impact that those around would pay a high price just to have one moment with us.

Let us always seek to touch the soul instead of the heart, because the soul is the depth of the sea, but the heart can change like the tide. For, Jeremiah reminds us, “Deceptive above all things is the human heart.” May we always seek to be the one thing which it’s hard to live without.

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Wednesday’s Ode #21 – Oops!

July 2, 2015July 2, 2015 / The WheatandTares / 1 Comment

My apologies for this late Ode! I have been sick over the last week, and yesterday, I just simply forgot to schedule this post. Ugh. I couldn’t believe it when I finally remembered late last night! Now, this was supposed to post earlier today, and I’ve had one technical difficulty after another! …the new update doesn’t seem to be so great. 😁 I’ll try to not let that happen again!

So, what I’d like to give ode to today is dates with my man. 😊 Ok, now, don’t tune me out thinking this is going to be a mushy-gushy post. I promise, I’ll stay focused (or at least try 😉) on the dates themselves and not how much I love him…I really do love him! Ok, focus… I absolutely LOVE dating my husband! I know, that may sound silly, strange, or even quite foreign for some marriages, but for us, we just love being together. We love going places together, exploring new things, hanging out and even going on “old, been there, done that” adventures together. When I say he’s my best friend, it’s actually for real. We just LIKE each other…even more than we love each other.

We will go to little country towns and shop for antiques, or we can go to the city and enjoy a fancy meal and the theater. We love to go to Highlands, NC and Ellijay, Ga., and Atlantic Station and the Marietta downtown square. We love to travel to places we have visited often, and we even love to find old gravel and dirt roads and “off road it” for a while. We’ve found all kinds of beautiful sights and new areas this way. One of our favorite little towns to visit is Dahlonega, Ga. I told a little bit about this in my Wednesday’s Ode about North Georgia. This is a great mountain town filled with lots of character (and characters from time to time, too! Lol). We love to pick from one of our favorite restaurants, like Bourbon Street Grill or The Oyster House, and then walk over to Paul Thomas’ Chocolate shop for dessert, then, just meander through town, looking in all the shops. We always have to include a trip to the General Store to kind of culminate the day. It’s a great little town. We love going on hikes and exploring new trails, finding waterfalls or just sitting beside a stream. We love finding great new restaurants and trying out any yummy new dish or dessert. We have even been known to just go for a drive to look at houses at Christmas time, looking for beautiful light displays or just going out for a quick little lunch date. Some of our most fun times have been when we’ve had an unexpected moment to have a date! Those are some real adventures. We just love being together, and that’s how a good relationship should be. If you’re the kind of person that can’t wait to get away from your spouse, I challenge you to ask yourself, “Why?” Now, I know, we all need a little space sometimes, and we need to enjoy an activity or two with the girls (or guys, respectively). I know we can’t spend 24/7 by our partner’s side; that might just lead to a little bit of codependency. However, if you can’t stand to be with your husband or wife, or you just can’t wait to get with the girls/guys all the time, or you’d rather be with you friends more than you are with your spouse, that’s when you need to step back and reevaluate some things. Marriages come and go too quickly in today’s society, and I think, often, it’s because of self-centeredness and a lack of remembering “why you got into this thing to begin with.” There was a reason you fell in love, and sometimes, you just need to remember why. Now, if it was simply out of lust, and you don’t care anything for that person now, that’s a whole other issue, and you might need to go back to the beginning and make things right with each other. However, too often, a man and woman just need to put away the petty issues, step out of the busyness of life, and take some time together to remember why they fell in love. I challenge you to try it. You might find I’m right! 😊

Dating is one of the biggest reasons Joey and I still have fun together. Our boys have asked us about our dating from time to time, “Why do you date?” “Why can’t we come?” “Why is it so important?” Our answer has always been, “It’s important, because it helps me love him/her more, and in turn, it helps us be better parents for you guys.” You may not know it, or even understand it, but the best thing you can do for a child is to love that child’s mother (or father, respectively), and that’s the truth!

So…let me go find my man, and see if we can schedule a little date for tomorrow! 😉

*just a few pics from the wonderful dates we’ve had…

First Priority vs. Last Resort

April 20, 2015April 18, 2015 / The WheatandTares / 1 Comment

I want to ask you today, do you live your life by first priorities or by the last resort? I mean, we all do it at some point, don’t we? Delay something until the inevitable happens…yeah, you gotta go to that dentist before they have to do surgery or something!

Let me explain a little more of what I mean…

FIRST PRIORITY

– you set out to do it…First

– you have lots of energy and focus for it

– you will forsake other things for this one… Often, all others things for this one

– your failure rate is lowered b/c you have incredible energy, intense concentration, deep passion and determination to

complete the task

– you willingly suffer pain, ridicule, criticism, heartache, even complete loneliness…if that’s what it takes

– you’ll change your hair, your clothes, your house, your town or location

– you’ll rise early, stay up late, not eat, not sleep, just to accomplish the goal.

– many times, you will quickly, or at least determinedly, alter your whole LIFE for this first priority

If you don’t believe me, let’s plug in a few words for that phrase “first priority”… Boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse, children, your BFF, sick or dying parent, new friends, new job, new position or title. We will do a lot to accomplish those first priorities.

But what about those last resorts? …those things that we wait and we ponder on …those ideas we “need more information on before we can complete” … (😉 wink) …those people maybe we “put on the back burner” for a little while …

You know, those things we just don’t accomplish or deal with at the onset…

LAST RESTORT

– this option usually isn’t much fun

– this option isn’t always attractive or exciting

– this choice may cost you emotions, energy, even suffering

– this choice may cost you monetary means or pride

– you put this off until there are no more options

– you have tried everything else with no success

– often, getting here is a result of procrastination, fear, laziness or even rebellion

– often, when you get here, you have lost your dream, your purpose, your passion and, sometimes, even your hope

Shall I name a few? Let’s see…

bad habits, weight-loss, doctors’ appointments, that 1500 page textbook reading, annual reports, or maybe it’s people… The in-laws and the outlaws, your boss, that friend that really gets on your nerves but keeps wanting to get together for coffee, …or maybe it’s just…..your mother! Ahh, those last resorts. They are definitely a sore spot, aren’t they?

Now, I’d like each of us to take a minute and examine our hearts to see where God fits in. Is He our first priority, or is He our last resort? Is He at the top of the list or the bottom? Do we give Him our first, our best or our last, our leftovers?

Living a life with habits which lead toward first priorities helps you to have better focus, more energy. It causes you to be more dependable and committed, and it saves you a lot of headache and worry in the end. If you’ll put God at the top of your priority list, you’ll be able to see more clearly and you’ll be able to find strength in what you must accomplish. It doesn’t mean everything will always be perfect, or without struggle, it simply means, you’ll have an internal peace and strength that will help you through those times. You’ll find as you consistently place Him at the top, those last resorts will be less frequently needed. As you consistently look to Him as your highest priority, you will find that many things just seem to “fall into place” a little easier.

Living a life with habits which always leads you to the last resort CAN be done; however, you do more surviving than you do thriving. You do more worrying than you do smiling. You do more crying than you do laughing. The Word says, “The JOY of the Lord is my strength.” Ask yourself, where is your joy today? Where are your concerns? Where are your priorities?

God is a gracious and loving God, and if you choose Him as a last resort, He will still love you. He will still forgive you. He will still help you, and He can still change and transform you! He will never neglect your cry simply because you choose Him last, but choosing Him first, as a first priority, helps YOU live a more full life. It helps you avoid more pitfalls. It helps you to love more deeply, and it helps you to laugh more freely!

Choosing God as your first priority helps YOU more than it does Him! 😉 So, if I can, let me encourage you today to choose God as you FIRST priority; so, you don’t have to seek Him out as your last resort!

“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” Matthew 6:33

Childlike Distractions

October 2, 2014 / The WheatandTares

Grace* was at the beach with her mother, sitting in the sand, watching the ocean. Recently, her church had sung a very popular song titled, “Oceans,”** and as she was sitting there, she began to sing…..it was so beautiful. Her little 5 year old voice rose with the tide as she lifted her praise to her God.
“You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail…And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise…My soul will rest in Your embrace. For I am Yours and You are mine… And my faith will be made stronger…In the presence of my Savior…”**
Her mother sang along with her, lost in this incredible moment of surrender to Her King. They gazed over the waves, feeling the cool breeze as the water washed over their feet and legs.
It was a moment she would forever cherish in her heart.
Then, all of a sudden, in mid-verse, Grace* stopped, and said, “Okay, there is a lot of sand in my bathing suit. I’m going to go get in the water and rinse off now.” Her mother looked at her in shock at the sudden change, and simply said, “Okay ,” and off Grace* went to be a child playing in the waves.
As the mother told me this little story, I was struck at how similar our lives are with God. We can sit down to enjoy a “precious moment” with Him, and we can become so enraptured in His sweet presence when we just let everything else go. We can sing, pray, or even dance, without a single worry or concern. Then, all of a sudden, the waves of alarm hit us, or the tide of time comes in, and we jump up, telling Him, “Well, I’ve got to go now. There’s so many agendas and cares to which I must tend.” Not much unlike this little girl, we, as adults, too often leave Him behind, and go about our business, as if that moment with Him was great, but we leave Him there on the shore as the cares of this world cloud our vision of Him and the moments we spent with Him.
It would be so much better for us if we could learn that He longs for us to remain in His presence throughout our whole day! He does want to hear us say, “Good Morning!” and listen to our bedtime prayers; however, He longs to walk beside us and let us tell Him about every moment of every hour of our day, too. Some might say, “I just don’t have time to stop and pray all day long,” and to those I would challenge with a question, “Why not?”
So many have a misconception that our relationship with God has to be filled with a bunch of “Thees” and “Thous,” and our prayer hours must be enclosed with angels singing and some priest chanting scriptures. Who ever convinced us of that has deceived our wayward hearts! Sure, we should have moments when there is no one else around and we “get alone until we’re not alone anymore,” but Jesus spent time with His disciples off the mountaintop, too. He walked with them; He ate with them. He traveled from town to town with them. He just “hung out” with them. If He did all that with them, while here on this earth, don’t you know He longs to do the same with us while He’s away?
Our Heavenly Father longs to have a relationship with us – a living, breathing, real relationship, one that includes life-altering “holy” moments as well as those simple, seemingly obscure, chats about our day.
So, I challenge you to examine your heart and ask yourself how well you know this Savior, this man who died that you might live. Ask yourself if you have a real relationship with Him or one that may be filled with too many childlike distractions…

*Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

**Credit: “Oceans” by Hillsong United. Album: Zion, 2013
I do not own, nor do I claim to own, any rights to this song, including music, lyrics, or any other contents of this song.