Sometimes, My Heart Just Grieves

/ The WheatandTares / 7 Comments

I’ve had several conversations over the past few week with friends who are going through incredibly tough seasons of life, and, as I think back through them all, my heart just feels heavy tonight. Many days, these conversations cause me to seek good, practical advice, Godly wisdom and a lot of scripture to encourage, admonish and uplift their weary hearts. Often, these stories told cause my spirit to rise up in righteous indignation over injustices done. I encourage them to fight, to never give up, to seek God, as well as, to seek their personal well being at all cost.

Yet, sometimes, like this evening, my heart just grieves over their losses and their pain. I wish I had a magical wand that could, somehow, make all the heartache, fear, doubt and turmoil just disappear. Wouldn’t that be wonderful?

If you’ve not experienced sorrow yet in your life, well, just keep on living, because it will come. If I can give you a piece of advice, both for those going through the trial and for those who are listening to the story, find someone to lean on. Don’t ever try to carry your burdens (or theirs) alone. You aren’t meant to.

Especially, for those of us who call ourselves a Christian. God never set up the Body of Christ for you to walk through this life experiencing all the brokenness it can bring and travel that painful journey alone. Find yourself a good church family, a wise pastor, spiritual leaders, and pour your heart out. Let them pray for you. Allow someone to come alongside you and help carry those burdens!

If you’re the one always walking alongside helping to carry the weight, you’ve got to learn to lean as well. You can’t always lean on those hurting, because they may not be ready to help carry you; however, you can find someone stronger than you to lend a helping hand. You’re not Superman! (Sorry to bust your bubble!)

Learn to lean. It’ll help you stand stronger.

Learn to release tears. They will wash your soul and help you to breathe deeper.

Learn to grieve. It’ll help your heart be real.

Learn to take a hand. It’ll help you to walk steady on that road to eternity.

Video is not mine. Simple YouTube search.

Video is not mine. Simple YouTube search.

Listen to both and be encouraged today. 💗

Be True to YOU!

/ The WheatandTares

I found this quote on Twitter awhile back, and it struck a chord within my soul. We hear so much today, in social media circles and in pop culture, about “being true to yourself,” or “being the ‘real’ me,” and while these statements have an element of truth, the real place of authenticity is found when you are true to the most healthy, healed and whole version of you.

Too often, we can get caught up in a popular trend or the peer pressures of life that we lose the authenticity of our soul. [yes, even adults can have “peer pressures!” It just comes in a little different, more subtle ways.😉] We start becoming something or someone we’re not simply to please the crowd or to fit into the environment in which we live, work, or “play.” Or we get so consumed in a past wound, trauma or tragedy that we cannot release the pain, and we become someone we were never meant to be.

Let me be clear, I am not trying to trivialize or make light of any trauma or heartbreak you have experienced. Believe me, I have plenty of my own. Yet, I believe in this day in age, with all the psychobabble and selfish outlook that too many “in power and spotlight” (celebrities, talkshows, politicians, even some therapists and teachers) give to those who follow, we have less people seeking healing and renewal of their minds and bodies than ever before. We have too many in our culture who make excuses for their pain and use a blaming, justification or gaslighting approach to life; so, they don’t have to “own up” to their own struggles and wrongs. They can simply hold someone else responsible for their own actions and words, and they never have to change.

This should not be, and it makes for a very sick, dysfunctional and perverse person and, eventually, will lead to a very wicked and evil society. If you are going to be “true to yourself,” then, why not be true to the best you you can be? Why settle for second best or broken or damaged? Why not take a risk, push a little harder and work toward getting help, healing and resolution to those wounded placed in your heart and soul? Why not work on discovering a new, healthy, healed, whole you?

Is it too much work? Not if you want better than you have right now. Is it too hard? Actually, that’s a decision only you can make. However, I can tell you this. If health and healing is your goal, you will discover more strength, along the way, than you ever thought or imagined possible! Once wholeness is between the goal posts of your life, it will give you a thirst for accomplishment that you didn’t know you could possess, and that thirst will be unquenchable until everything else is laid aside for the “win!”

This may sound like a funny comparison, but it’s like being a kid when your granny is cooking a chocolate cake (or whatever deliciousness is your favorite), and you come in when she’s on her second batch. So, the house is consumed with the yummy smells of the dessert, and she asks you if you want to lick the bowl/spoon. You get just a taste of that chocolatey goodness, and it becomes all you can think about. You can hardly wait until she pulls that cake out of the oven, lets it cool and tells you it’s ready to consume. You become so anxious and impatient that she finally kicks you out of the kitchen in fear you will just jerk that thing right out of the oven and hurt yourself! 😂

That’s exactly how it is when you commit to being “you” in the true, healed and whole sense. You get that taste of strength, of peace, of joy and of renewal, and you won’t want to go back to the broken, desperate and desolate being you once were! You’ll long for that wholeness and become so consumed with the possibility that nothing will keep you from it’s revelation!

Are you hungry yet??

“May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul, and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it.” 1 Thessalonians 5:23-24 (NIV)

“He makes me whole again, steering me off worn, hard paths to roads where truth andrighteousness echo His name.” Psalm 23:3 (The Voice Bible)

Tuesday’s Treats #171

/ The WheatandTares / 1 Comment

Bourbon Barrel Beef & Ale

Location: Waynesville, NC

This restaurant isn’t big in size, but what they don’t have in size, they definitely have in taste! The large room consists of four booths, the bar seating, a handful of tables and chairs and an open meeting type room with a long section of tables and chairs (put together to form one long).

When we first sat down, we were a bit disappointed, because the last time my husband was here, he ate from the dinner menu, and there was a much bigger list from which to choose. He had told us about sever different entrees he had had, and we were expecting to enjoy some of that fare. So, when the waitress informed us we couldn’t order from the menu until after 5:00, we almost revolted. Lol.

We decided to make the best of it and began our orders. My husband got the Paw’s Old Fashioned Burger. Our son got the chicken fingers and fries. Our friends ordered the 1/2 BBQ Sammy and soup, Paw’s Old Fashioned Burger, and I ordered the BLGT: bacon, lettuce, & fried green tomato sandwich.

Oh. My. Word. Everything was absolutely delicious. The burgers were outstanding. My friend really liked the BBQ pork sandwich. She said the meat was tasty; although, she said she would have liked a little more slaw and sauce on it. She said the beef stew was amazing! The fries are like potato wedges, which I love; so, I stole some from my son. Lol. His chicken was fresh, cut slices (like you’d serve on a salad) with this amazing batter served atop the potato wedges. Yum!

We all decided the BLGT took the prize. It was absolutely amazing! This is not your regular BLT! The Italian panini is paired with a ton of nicely (not too much, but just enough) battered fried green tomato, applewood bacon with lettuce and a black pepper mayo. There must have been four green tomatoes…I had one on each half, ate one and shared one! I had actually asked for the mayo on the side, but they left it on, and honestly, I was skeptical when the plate came, but it was so very good!!

We look forward to being back in the area to eat here again!

Website

Just say, “NO!”

/ The WheatandTares / 7 Comments

SOMETIMES, we just need to learn to say, “NO!”

We heard this statement many times on television through those anti-drug commercials of the 80’s. We heard it month after month, encouraging all to not give into the enticing voices of culture and drug dealers who would lie and say, “Just a little won’t hurt you!”

Yet, we seem to have moved further and further from the totality of this sentiment as we’ve become a “tolerant society” that seems more bent on pushing one agenda or another rather than actually saying, “No” to many things to which we need. We seem to have risen to a new level of “tolerance” where every cultural opinion must be agreed to, or we risk being called a racist, fascist or just simply a bigot. As I’ve stated before, just because I disagree with you does not mean I hate you.

I disagree with my husband at times; yet, he is my best friend, my confidante and my love. I disagree with my children, especially when their decisions will put them in dangerous situations; yet, I love them so much, I’d lay my life down for them. My loyalty may not run as deep for you or for those with whom I disagree and do not know personally, but it does not mean I harbor hate within my heart simply because of my disagreement.

Yet, because of my own experiences, life choices and personal convictions, you and I may not agree on all things. Ya know what? That is completely ok! You may live your life quite differently than mine, and that’s ok, too. That’s actually part of living, and that part of being an individual and having your own choices.

Being of different opinions is okay, too. However, when those opinions begin infringing upon someone else’s personal wellbeing, there should be a wake up call. When those agendas or disagreements come with an expectation of agreement and are followed with a demand of approval or a threat of consequences if not adhered, then, a separation and distance should be put into place for those involved.

Sometimes, we just need to find the courage to say, “No,” and stick to our decision. Sometimes, we need to find our backbone and settle into the boundaries we have set for a dangerous relationship or a rebellious child or a consistently wounding acquaintance and resolve to leave it there. Sometimes, we need to cut the ties with that toxic person in our life with whom only turmoil and chaos resides.

Sometimes, for our own sanity, peace of mind and personal wellbeing, we must look at the “appointment book” of our life and reply to their request,

“No, Thursday’s out. … Yeah, Friday’s out, too. … How about never – is never good for you?”

Fight. Win. Share Your Story.

/ The WheatandTares

I found this pictured quote posted the other day, and it seems I’ve shared it a gazillion times this week. It’s such a simple statement; yet, it seems so profound. Everyone of us, whether you’d like to admit it or not, has someone within reach who has walked the new and painful paths we must face throughout life, often times, that person is even within your orbit of living.

Whether it be sickness, terminal illness, relationship heartbreak, job loss, death of a loved one, divorce, tragedy, or whatever, there is someone out there who can relate. Especially now, with as much access we all have in cyberspace, the ability to reach out to someone who at the very least has a slight understanding, is exponential. There are resources upon resources to find knowledge, personal experience testimonies and short groups for any every dilemma one might face.

In many ways, it seems to be easier now than any other time in history to overcome what dilemmas and trials might come. Yet, our suicide and trauma rates seem to be higher than any other time in history. I have a theory to this, and please forgive me, I’m not an expert, and I’m definitely not trying to trivialize any pain or conflict you may have experienced in a particular scenario. However, I do hope this theory will resonate: more often than not, we hav become a society that focuses too much on “me and mine,” rather than, realizing there is a whole new generation coming behind us who need the wisdom, the testimonies, the experience and the legacy of both failures and achievements that we can give.

Understand, I am not stating this from of “high and mighty judgment,” never realizing the pain of depression, sorrow or suicidal thoughts or tendencies. I have been to low points in my life that I’d rather not share in this current post. I have

If it had not been for the grace of God, the prayers of those who knew and loved me, and the self-fortitude and remembrance in my own heart and mind of my higher calling and purpose, I assure you, I wouldn’t be writing this today, and you could be visiting me in the cemetery on a sunny day.

I can attest to the truth of this quote. You come through those hellish nights, and you persevere through those grueling, sun-scorched days of pain in order to help someone else along the way. Or at least, you should, because it is through your testimony of grace and endurance that someone else can find their strength to hope for a brighter tomorrow.

So, push on, broken one. Hum until you sing again. Struggle until you find your fight. Strive until you thrive. For there is some lost soul searching in the dark for just one clear footstep to help lead them out beyond the storm.

Perspective Can Make or Break You

/ The WheatandTares

I saw this the other day, and I thought, “Yep. Isn’t that the dang truth?” If ever forget where you came from OR you lose sight of where you are going, it’s no better than if you drop your compass in the middle of a rain forest and wonder why you can’t find your way back home.

If I ever forget where I came from, then, my perspective becomes skewed either out of arrogance or out of self-abasement. If arrogance, I begin to somehow believe I am better than I am. I trust in my own wisdom, and I rely on myself for everything I need, forgetting that the achievements and victories I’ve achieved have not only come by my own strength and resilience, but also, by every friend, family, and sometimes even total strangers, who encouraged and cheered me on along the way. If self-abasement is the angle, it is the same road of sorrow and self-focus, only it has more hidden objectives and behaviors. It’s still an arrogant approach, because self-abasement comes from a place of self-loathing to the point you cannot receive wisdom, strength or even encouragement from anyone, and you live your life in a perpetual rejection of and rebellion against any ounce of truth.

If I lose sight of where I am going, then, my perspective for the future is skewed, because I have no focus, no direction and no purpose for days ahead. Ultimately, I die in the embalming of my yesterdays, because I have no hope for my tomorrows.

Our past molds and shapes us for our present being, and our future gives us hope for which to grow and reach beyond our today…

Tuesday’s Treats #170

/ The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

The Falls Landing

Location: Brevard, NC

This is a great place for lunch, and it seems quite packed most of the time, but if you enjoy certain seating arrangements in a restaurant (like a corner, wall or booth setting), I’d definitely arrive early. This is a rather small restaurant, and the seating is pretty limited. There are two cool window tables, three booths around the bar area, three tables on the other side of this granite wall, and then, the rest of the tables and chairs a pretty much like cafe seating. It’s a nice atmosphere; however, I’m not sure I’d come for a romantic dinner or anything like that, but then, we didn’t come at night. It could be different.

Even though, we came actually looking for a steak, the food was tasty. They don’t have steaks on the lunch menu, and they don’t allow you to order from the dinner menu. So, we perused the lunch menu and chose from it.

My husband ordered the salmon BLT; our son ordered the beef tip sandwich without the bread, and I had the chicken club. My husband’s sandwich and mine was delicious. As sides, my husband got fries, and I got a side salad. Our son didn’t really like his, and I think it was mainly due to the fact the steak wasn’t really seasoned. I suppose, because it was made for the sandwich, which was to have pepper jack, onions, mayo, lettuce and tomato. Regardless, would have been nice to have it a bit seasoned.

The desserts were incredible! I do have to say, the key lime was lacking a bit in the crust, a little too thin to my liking, but the pie itself was tasty and tart. The molten lava cake was a big hit with our son. However, the derby pie absolutely stole the show!! Oh. My. Goodness. I could have eaten a whole piece of that myself! We will probably go back just for the desserts!

Here is the website for more info.

Tuesday’s Treats #169

/ The WheatandTares / 4 Comments

Binion’s Roadhouse

Location: Hendersonville, NC

The atmosphere of this restaurant is almost identical to a Texas Roadhouse with a little more local flair. It looks fun and inviting, and the food looks delicious.

I will preface the rest of my review with, “maybe it was an off day…” We chose this restaurant, because it was rated #1 in Hendersonville on Trip Advisor. Our experience began with being seated in the back room, next to the patio area, directly in front of the ice machine/waiter drink station. We relocated to the patio area where it was bit better, albeit a bit dirty with the table needing wiped and the waiter cleaning station (paper towels and winded/cleaners) nearby. All of this was a little disconcerting, but we were with friends; so, we just decided to make the best of it. However, the stark difference between these two areas and the rest of the (NOT full) restaurant was definitely noticed on the trip to the restroom. 🙄😑

The butter yeast rolls and peanut “appetizers” that are immediately served were delicious. We ordered steaks, salads, and a veggie plate. The taste of the steaks were incredible, but all three were cooked one step beyond what was requested (ordered 1 medium, 2 medium well, received 1 mw and the 2 well). The sides and veggie plate were amazing. If you like broccoli cheese casserole, squash casserole (without onions!), corn pudding, sweet potatoes, fries or sweet potato soufflé with the brown sugar/pecan topping, you will love theirs!

All in all, the sides are delicious, and the steaks are tasty, just order it a notch below what you’d like. And ask for a table inside on the “nicer” side of the restaurant. Lol.

Check out more here.

Tuesday’s Treats #168

/ The WheatandTares / 3 Comments

*My apologies to anyone who reads Tuesday’s Treats, and you’ve wondered where they’ve been! They’re back online, and, hopefully, here to stay for awhile!😉*

Marco’s Trattoria

Location: Brevard, NC

We dropped by here after a long day of traveling, and we had plans to simply feed our teenage son and get a “little bite of something.” Well, a bread basket, two soups, salad, cheese pizza (for son), and an entree of baked halibut later, we left stuffed!! 😂 Everything was delicious, and we will definitely be back!

The italian bread basket is served with an olive oil/herb mix that is incredible. The tomato basil soup and crab bisque was amazing, and the halibut was tasty. We ordered both soups, because we wanted to taste each. I think we both enjoyed the tomato basil a bit more than the crab, but each one was unique and delicious.

The baked halibut had a lemon garlic sauce and topped with crab meat. Halibut is one of my favorite fish, and you can’t find it all the time; thus, the reason we splurged. Honestly, I’m not sure I’d order it again. It was definitely tasty, but we both decided we like grilled or blackened halibut best. The salad was also tasty, as was the pizza.

They do make the pizzas with King Arthur’s non-bleached, non-bromated flour; so, that made me very happy. (It’s better for you… if you can consider pizza “healthy.”😂) If you’ve not had this type, it’s makes the crust a tad bit sweeter and more filling than regular pizza dough, and the ingredients on top were delicious! They have several “pre-made” types, and they have a build-your-own choice with a plethora of toppings.

The atmosphere is nice, and there are tables and chairs, as well as, a few booths and outdoor seating. We are here on a Monday night, and the host asked if we had reservations. We didn’t and we’re led to a nice corner table, but when a booth opened up, we did ask if we could move there. The waitress said she’s have to see if it was reserved; so, apparently, if you want a particular seat I think the house, be sure to call ahead.

Here is the website to find more information.

The Sweet Perfume

/ The WheatandTares

Be encouraged today… Smell the sweet fragrance of Hope and Grace. 💗

The WheatandTares's avatarthe grizzle grist mill

Over the last month or so, I’ve been trying to get consistent with walking daily through my neighborhood. I’m not crazy consistent, but I’ve definitely done better than before I started. Ha!

Our neighborhood is beautiful, and it has plenty of curves and hills; so, I feel I’m getting quite the workout, and the whole thing, all cul-de-sacs (5) included, is just shy of 1.5 miles. So, I try to make 2 loops, which gives me right at 3 miles. Woohoo!

The weather was absolutely perfect today. The humidity was extremely low, and the temp was maybe in the high seventies by the time I stepped out my front door, right at sunset, to try and get in a full 2 loops of walking before it was too dark. I asked my youngest son to go with me; so, I wouldn’t be by myself, and he wouldn’t be left home…

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