Fog & Hugs

January 21, 2015January 20, 2015 / The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

JGrizz said the other day, “Ya know, mom, fog is like a great big hug…like a great big hug from God.” As I looked out across the water, with the fog hovering like a blanket, I couldn’t deny the closeness, the feeling of being embraced by the fuzzy white haze. Then I turned my thoughts toward heaven and thought of how much He loves us, and how much he blesses us everyday, even in the smallest things, just to show us He cares.

If we will but open our eyes to see, we will realize He sends little “hugs and kisses” from heaven all throughout the days, weeks and even years of our lives. It may be in the gentle smile of your newborn babe as he looks at you with his innocent love. It may be in the beautiful sunrise breaking through the trees, sending a tense warm to your face. It may be in the joyful giggles of your little girl who wants ‘just one more’ push on the swing. It might even be in the quiet reflection of your teenage son as He ponders over the fog settling upon the waters and believing God has sent him a hug.

We drove across a dam early one morning, and it was so foggy, I could hardly see to drive. All of a sudden, I saw a rainbow, as my eyes followed its path, I realized that we were going to drive right through the rainbow, almost as if it were a tunnel! It as one of the neatest things I’ve ever seen! (In the last pic below, but wasn’t real clear on the picture). Going through, I had this thought, “Aw, thanks God! You sure know how to make a girl feel loved and blessed!”

He sends us visual messages through so many venues. All we have to do is step back, take a deep breath and really see Him. Jeremiah 29:13 says, “You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart.” It’s true, and He doesn’t hide when we seek Him. He always keeps His promises. All we have to do is look for Him.

So, next time it’s foggy, don’t get scared or annoyed, just wk outside for a moment; let it surround you, and receive your great big hug from God. 🙂

The Depth of Your Love

January 20, 2015January 20, 2015 / The WheatandTares

The trees sway to sing of Your praise.

The birds fly amidst Your grace.

The clouds swirl and form under Your glory.

Even the smallest weed stretches up to honor Your name.

Your love forever amazes my inmost being.

Your admiration for this land and its creatures.

You created us for Your worship and exaltation,

And yet, our selfishness wars against Your very nature.

The depth of Your grace, my soul cannot fathom.

The expanse of Your forgiveness, my heart can’t comprehend.

The height of Your patience, my mind cannot see.

Even this inward flesh, I seem unable to bend.

Oh God, consume this humanness of which I live.

Burn a fire inside by Your holiness and by Your grace.

Melt away all the pride, the hatred and the insolence.

Even then, can I possibly hope to look upon Your face?

Penned – MG – 4/25/01

You Still Love Me

January 19, 2015January 16, 2015 / The WheatandTares / 4 Comments

I fail You time and time again
I bite
I claw
I fight my way to the win
And I continue to fail to see
What it is You’re showing me

You still love me

I nail you there over and over again
I hate
I lust
I struggle to succeed in the sin
And I constantly miss the target
What You’re urging me to forget

You still love me

I crucify the very One who gives me life
I deny the Son who has broken my strife
I refuse comfort, protection, a guide
For the very sake of my own pride

You still love me

You loved me before time began
You will love me still until time stands
Your grace finds me in the depths
Your mercy reaches me in the rock clef

You still love me

Why?

My soul cries

You are My child

My heart cannot deny

You still love me

Penned – MG – 1/15/15

Grade for Color

January 12, 2015January 11, 2015 / The WheatandTares / 1 Comment

Do you grade a Kindergartener on their ability to color within the lines? Do you grade a toddler on his ability to walk around with never falling? How about a young teen in her ability to drive a car through a busy street for the first time?

If you are a reasonable human being, the answer to these questions would definitely be, “NO!” If we, who are so imperfect, don’t expect perfection from our children, who are so young and just learning, why would we believe God would expect perfection from us??

Do you realize He is the Creator of the universe? He spoke, and there was light! He took the stars in His hands, as if they were tiny grains of sand, and flung them across the heavenlies. He tells this one to go, and he goes, and He tells this one to stay, and He stays. He is infinite. He is majestic. He is God, and He loves us.

We were created by an infinite Being. We are mortal. We are imperfect. We are flawed. We are human; yet, He loves us. He loves us with a love that our tiny minds can’t possibly understand. He loves us beyond measure. He loves us without condition. He loves us beyond what we can even fathom. If this kind of God can love us through our humanness, and we can love our children beyond their “child-ness,” how can we ever believe we must become more for Him to love us more?

Yet, we do. Too often, we place expectations upon ourselves to be more, to do more, to say more, thinking it will make Him love us more. When we falter and when we fail, we then walk around in constant condemnation, believing, somehow, that He now loves us less. His love is not like that. He sent His only Son to die for us while we were still sinners! He loves us more than we could ever imagine trying to love our own children! He loves us more than we love ourselves! His love is unconditional, immeasurable and infallible, and He offers it freely to us, without condition.

All we are required to do is receive it. All we have to do is believe. If you had a package on your doorstep that contained all the riches of the world, or all the desires of your heart, wouldn’t you run to find it? Wouldn’t you rush to open it? Yet, often, we hesitate with the very One who gave us this breath we breathe. We pause to accept the very Life He freely offers.

I encourage you today, don’t stop coloring your beautiful picture, this picture called life, in fear of the “teacher.” Don’t stop coloring in fear of failure. Color on, my friend, and remember, your Heavenly Father loves you. He doesn’t hate you. He’s not going to tear up your beautiful masterpiece, because you fall outside the lines a little. He’s not going to yell at you, because your bold marks reach the edge of the page. He will guide you to a better way. He will let you grow, and He will help you to learn His ways. He will convict your heart of the error, but He will not condemn you for your mistake. He will direct you to a better path, and His love will convince you of the needed change. His grace will draw you a new picture, and His mercy will help to fill in the gaps. When you truly see Him, you will never be the same.

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23

Have and Hold Forever

January 9, 2015January 11, 2015 / The WheatandTares / 4 Comments

I’m not sure a mother’s heart ever lets go of her child, neither through age nor death. That mother’s love is tangled up with that child from the moment she realizes she’s pregnant, or at least, very quickly thereafter, and it seems to remain a tangled mess for the rest of her life!

Now, I know, I speak as a mom who deeply loves and adores her children. Some moms are just too wounded to see past their pain, and others are so angry, they can’t see beyond the rage to the tender hearts within their grasp. Still others, they have become so narcissistic, they cannot see anything but their own ambitions and desires; so, please, know that my reference in this post has nothing to do with those types of mothers. Those moms need some desperate help before they destroy the precious seed which they have been given to nurture and provide sweet tender care for the next 18-20 years of their life. No, I’ll be referring to the moms out there, who, regardless of their human faults and failures, seek to do right by their child and work hard to imagine for, provide for and propel that child into greatness beyond what she, personally, might have been.

When you’re this kind of mother, you just want to hug them and hold them forever. You want to shelter that little heart from ever feeling any brokenness, pain and even disappointment. You want to protect that small mind from any wayward thought, evil deed or malice intent. You want to shield those tiny little eyes from all the sin, violence and everything not pleasant. You want to provide a refuge, a safe haven in which they can rest for the entirety of their life.

Yet, just as an eagle will cripple her eaglet if she refuses to start pulling the feathers from the nest, each of us will fatally cripple our children if we refuse to let them grow, learn, and yes, even experience pain and disappointment from time to time. We must allow them to spread their wings and learn to fly, or they will remain paralyzed in that nest for the rest of their lives, only to crawl to a miserable death, a death of dreams, opportunities, potential and life itself. We must allow them to fly!

Flight can be such a scary thing, especially when they are so young, so inexperienced, so fragile. Flight can challenge them to dream, to push beyond the limits, to test their own abilities. Have you ever watched a baby barnacle goose learn to fly? If not, you should look it up sometime (you can click hereto watch). …well, maybe, if you have the heart for it. I almost didn’t.
[*please note: this is a very intense, heart-wrenching, yet, very real, short film.]

The first time I saw this video, I almost busted into tears! The tiny, downy-feathered gosling was far up in the nest, high above the rocky cliffs below. It was several hundred feet up, I’m sure. He climbs out of the nest and begins to fall. I almost stuck my hands out, trying to catch him, before I remembered it was simply a video, and there was nothing I could do. The baby keeps falling and falling, crying out the whole time; then, he “bumps” the rocks on his way down. Then he bumps it again and again. Then he smacks the rocks at the very bottom. I was sure the little precious thing was dead! After he laid there a few seconds, I felt certain he was a goner.

Tears rolled down my cheeks as, I truly believed, I had just witnessed the death of this barnacle gosling. I began to wonder what idiot had made this video with no prior warning for viewers like me! To my surprise and relief, the parents waddled over to where the baby was and waited patiently as the little guy slowly lifted his head and waddled up to them for comfort and moral support. I could not believe he had made it!

Has parenting ever felt like this? If you haven’t experienced this type of worry, frustration and fear, just hold on, and keep on living. The time may come when your little one jumps out of that nest and “plummets” to the bottom of the ravine! You may have to watch them as they “free fall” through their temptations and vices, seeming to race to certain death. If you will cover them in sincere prayer, now and throughout it all, God will hear your cry. If you will train them up now in the faith of God, they will make it!

Depending on their personal venture, their own response to it, and their surrender to God throughout it, they may come through with a few bumps, bruises and , yes, maybe even scars, but they will survive. If they don’t have the grace of God to cushion their fall, the sharp and jagged rock of life will surely damage them beyond repair. Yet, if they have the Word of truth, the sword of the Spirit, and the shield of faith, they can face whatever may come, and God will protect them. He is the best covering they can have!

As a protective mother, I’d prefer they never had to make that leap. As loving moms, we’d prefer that child to just stay safe and secure within our grasps so that no harm or danger ever come near them. Yet, we know if we continue to shelter them through the hardships of life, it doesn’t make them stronger. It only weakens them for the journey that, one day, they will be traveling apart from us.

They need the challenge. They need the flight training, and they need the faith to soar. It is our job to instill within them the knowledge and understanding of that faith. It is our responsibility to help them see the great big world before them and know the pitfalls that will try to trap them. It is our commission to pray endlessly for their journey and for their flight. It is our right to shelter, protect, love and support them until the time comes that they must fly, but fly they must. If they don’t, they will die. Their dreams will die, and their destiny will be lost.

So, go ahead, momma. Hold that baby tight. Strengthen his wings and help him to stand. Deepen her faith and teach her to flap those wings, preparing for flight. When the time is right, they will soar to new heights. They will fly to distant lands, and they will take a part of you with them as you stand there holding a piece of their heart within your hands.

It’s a New Tradition

January 3, 2015November 22, 2018 / The WheatandTares / 4 Comments

To be honest, I have always been kind of against going out to eat on Christmas and Thanksgiving Day. I was always of the opinion you should be at home for those meals, carrying on the traditions of family. You see, I grew up with the traditions of home, family, and living out the legacy of that family. When I was young, we would have great big gatherings at my grandparents’ home; all of the family would be there! It was kind of like a homecoming. See, I have always been an only child, but my three cousins, and my grandmother’s three sisters and husbands, with all their children, would come; so, we would end up with a house full! No one would want to miss. Those were some great times. I never felt alone or left out, and it was, as if, we were just one great big, happy family!

As I’ve grown older, things have changed, and our family has grown distant over miles and time. I, now, live in a different state, as several others do, and there have been those, within our family, who have experienced divorce and death. These things change people; they change the dynamics of a close-knit family, and our family has somewhat drifted.

However, late in 2012, my husband and I were down for a holiday, and we decided to try to get everyone together at “the old homestead” where my grandmother still lives. We had a “dessert” get together, because many had things to do, and there were lots of children involved. So, we gathered for desserts, coffee and fellowship. It was so fun! Granted, it wasn’t the same as years gone by, and not everyone who used to come was there, but those who could, came, and old friendships were rekindled, new ones were made, and our children got to experience the togetherness from which each of us were raised. My husband and I decided, from now on, whenever we were back “home,” we’d make a point to do this again. It was a great “new tradition” that was made.

This Christmas, my husband, boys and I were with my parents and grandmother for a few days in TN, and we decided to try another “new tradition.” We went out to a restaurant for our Christmas Day meal. It was different, and it was wonderful!! You see, the last several years, we have tried to pull together a huge traditional meal at my mother’s house, and, for various reasons that I won’t go into, it has always been a struggle. We have each ended up frustrated and ill at one another, and it has never really seemed to have work out as each of us had hoped it would. Last year, my grandmother said, “I’m not doing this (the meal) again!” So, this Christmas, I remembered that statement, and we worked to change the norm. We found a really nice, upscale restaurant in town that would be open on Christmas Day. We were seated by the beautiful stone fireplace, and we could see the city streets as shoppers passed by on their merry way. We had steaks, baked potatoes, prime rib and shrimp. Everything was wonderful! The fellowship with one another was the best it’s been in years, and we didn’t have to clean up afterwards, either! …That was simply awesome! 😉

Later, when we got back to the house to enjoy homemade desserts and open presents together, my eighty-five year old grandmother called us all together for an “executive meeting.” We were each nervous at first, because she doesn’t normally do that, and we thought we might be in trouble! (Haha!) She said, “I want us all to decide, right now, that from now on, when we come together for a holiday, we go out to eat! …even after I’m gone, you do this!!” We all laughed, mostly from the relief of not being in trouble, and we all said, “I second…yes, Ma’am!” The rest of the day was simply wonderful as we spent time sharing together and watching as the children tore into their gifts. It was a great Christmas Day!

I wrote this to share with you how traditions can be made in all kinds of ways. Your family is going to be different than mine, and our traditions may be totally opposites, but as long as they work for you and your family, that is what really matters. As long as your traditions bring your families together and draws out the love and comraderie among you, that’s what’s important!

So, make a new tradition this year or simply keep an old one! Just be together at those important times, and make those memories that will last for all times. We are never guaranteed tomorrow. We don’t know who will be at the next family celebration, and who might have said goodbye by then; so, make the moments count. Cherish one another, and if an old tradition just doesn’t seem to work now for the family as a whole, think about trying a new one. Keeping traditions, only for the sake of the tradition, especially, when it is only tearing your family apart, is not really worth it. Traditions are made to make people stronger, to take relationships deeper and to bring wisdom, character and love into the family. When a tradition only brings strife, chaos and division, it’s either time for some heart changes, or its time for a new tradition! I’m so glad we made ours! 🙂

It’s Tradition, Again

December 20, 2014 / The WheatandTares / 2 Comments

The other night, my youngest and I continued a tradition that hasn’t really been an annual, very consistent, tradition; however, I’ll call it a tradition, nonetheless. We made sugar cookies together…complete with the rolling out of dough, cookie cutter figures, making our own icing (for the very first time!), and sprinkles and nonpareils. It was messy, but it was, oh, so fun!!

We had the movie, Home Alone 2, playing in the background as we floured the countertop and rolling pin, flattened the dough and prepared it for the cookie cutters. We pressed the cutters into the dough, making snowmen, Christmas holly, stars, and trains. We baked them, painted them and let them dry. We ate a few and stood back to admire our handiwork. He did an awesome job! …Mine looked more like a four year old’s creation (no offense to the four year olds out there! Haha).

Never letting him know, I, personally, was very disappointed that my “creations” didn’t turn out much better than they did, and it really turned into quite a bit of work detail to finish the extra dozen after he was just simply “done” and didn’t care to finish! However, to see the joy on my little boy’s face when he had decorated his “big bear” and to realize that memory would be sealed in each of our hearts forever, it was all worth it! 🙂

I’m so glad I took the time tonight to make a memory. There were so many other needs and responsibilities pulling for my attention, but that little nine year old won’t always be pulling for my attention. These days are so fleeting. I’m so glad I ignored the other things that were screaming my name. I’m so glad I made the moment last just one more time.

So, even if the sugar cookie making is not a tradition like the others we have, which are more consistent through the years, I believe we will keep this one each year, or every other year, or maybe just when we “spontaneously” want to keep it. Spontaneity and tradition can go hand in hand, sometimes! The memories that are etched on our hearts at that moment may even last longer, sometimes, than those traditions which we tend to do more out of routine and expectancy.

So, make a point to keep those traditions, create some new ones, and strive for those spontaneous “together-moments” whether you do them bi-annually, or simply, when you think of it from one child to the next! You’ll love the memories you’ll gather, the fun times that will be had, and one day, your children will thank you!

MAKE a new tradition, or keep an old tradition…again!
JUST MAKE A MEMORY!! 🙂

A Season For Tears…A Season For Cheer

December 14, 2014December 15, 2016 / The WheatandTares

Yesterday, I was so emotional all day, I felt I had to hold back the tears with all my might. It all began when I read a Facebook status update from a friend and relative who has lost her grandmother and grandfather within almost a month of each other and how she is struggling with the grief while trying to maintain a cheerful home for her children during the holidays. The feelings just washed over me like a tidal wave of how much I miss my own grandfather, even though, he’s been gone for over 12 years now. So much changed within my family after his death, and without him here, it will never be the same. Christmas has never been the same without him.

Several times throughout the day, I thought of him, and I began thinking of so many who have lost a mom, a dad, a child, or another loved one during this past year and even those who have lost someone during the past several years. I, also, thought of so many families I know who are facing divorce, or have already divorced, and even though their significant other hasn’t died physically, their love has died, and that is as painful as the reality of death. Losing a precious family member or friend makes the holidays a little tougher to handle. It makes the cheer and the joy of the season seem a little less festive, and sometimes, it makes it a lot less festive, maybe not even worth celebrating at all. Often, losing a loved one, especially those who filled such a huge part of our heart and our home, makes the Christmas season almost unbearable. Everyone else is cheerful, excited and filled with joy for all the wonderful things that bring the love of Christmas, and our world has just turned a little more gray from the loss of color with which our loved one took away.

If you are one whose world is a little more gray today, there is hope! It’s not a fairy tale, and it’s not a fallacy. It’s not a plastic mask which you wear just to convince your family that you’re okay. It’s, also, not a “snap of the finger and you’re perfect” solution, and it’s not a formula nor is it a potion or a thought. It’s not even an “it.” It’s a person, a Messiah, a Savior and a King.

His name is Jesus. He can comfort your heart and encourage your soul. He can give you peace which surpasses understanding. He can consume your mind with good thoughts, and He can give you a reason to get up one more day. He is HOPE. He is LOVE. He is LIFE, and He can give you all this and more. All you have to do is call on His name, and He will answer. He will wrap you in His arms of love, and He will give you purpose again. All you have to do is just trust Him.

For all of us who have learned to cope with the deep scars of loss, and for those who have yet to experience this heart-wrenching pain, maybe we can be a little kinder to those who are hurting this Christmas season. Maybe we can be a little more attentive to those who may not feel as festive as we expect them to be. Maybe we can share a little more love, a little more encouragement, a little more hope. Those of us who have found this One Hope who helps us survive through the darkest of nights, we must share Him with those around us. We must share this Hope with a hurting and desperate world. We must share why our Christmas is so Merry.

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” Isaiah 9:6

It’s Tradition

December 13, 2014December 13, 2014 / The WheatandTares

Christmas is my most favorite holiday of the year. There are so many reasons for my loving it. I love the warmth and love I feel while surrounded by family. I love the heightened feelings of joy, generosity and kindness that seems to resonate in most everyone’s heart. I love the wonder of a child who is anxiously awaiting Christmas morn. They can hardly go to sleep on Christmas Eve, as they strain to hear sleigh bells and reindeer hoofs upon the roof, and they run to the living room early the next morning to see if, just maybe, a midnight visitor has nibbled on their gift of milk and cookies. I love to see the twinkle in my sons’ eyes when they receive that special gift from their list which they weren’t quite sure if we’d be able to fulfill.

I love looking forward to the snow that might fall, and I love to wrap up in layers of cozy attire and walk around in the winter wonderland. I love to sit by the warm fire, drinking hot cocoa, while cuddled up with my sweet boys and my love, watching a Christmas special on TV, even though, we’ve seen it every year for the last 10! I love playing endless Christmas carols on the radio and singing till my voice almost disappears. I love making little goodie bags for the boys’ classes at school or for those in our neighborhood that includes a special little note of God’s love and hope for this broken world. I love picking out an “angel” ornament off the tree in our church foyer and supplying Christmas for a child whom, otherwise, might not have gotten anything underneath his tree. I love going in the stores and seeing all the lights, the decorations and hearing all the cheer. I love saying, “Merry Christmas!” when a sales person is required to say, “Happy Holidays,” and watching their eyes light up, because that is what they’d rather be saying to me. I love making someone smile who is feeling weary, doubtful or fearful and reminding them there is a wonderful reason we celebrate this season, and there is hope for their life. I just love Christmas time!

One of the things I look forward to the most at Christmas is putting up our pre-lit tree and taking part in, once again, the family traditions which we began so many years ago. When I was just a babe, my mom began collecting ornaments for me each year, and we have continued the tradition with our boys. We have a little nativity scene, which is presented with a storybook of, “What God wants for Christmas,” with which we commemorate Christ in the season, and this year, we began an “It’s All About Christmas” jar, in which we write a little note of gratefulness or what the season means to us, and we will read on Christmas Eve to celebrate the day. These are the traditions which cause us to remember the importance and the “reason for the season.” These are the traditions that bring us together as a family and remind us that love is at the center of that reason.

Does your family do something special during this time of year? What are YOUR Christmas traditions? I’d love to hear about them! Please feel free to add them in the comments below. 🙂